Through My Eyes
by RockenRollTurtle
Summary: I was to busy to mind that I was letting my guard down, letting my soft side show for the whole world to see. None of that mattered, just the feel of her damp hair agianst my stroking hand KAIxOC
1. I wont hurt you

_**--Info--**_

_**Title: Through My Eyes**_

_**Author: Kia (a.k.a. RockenRollTurtle)**_

_**Time: After G Rev**_

_**Setting: Moscow, Russia**_

_**Point of veiw: First person**_

_**Story: This is told from Kai's point of view after the G Revolutions have all gone their seperate ways after the BEGA tournament for a little R and R. Kai is enjoying his time at home in Russia when an unexpected event leads him to meet a homeless girl in an sidestreet. From this short encounter, strange things stir up deep inside Kai, and he has no idea what it is. What he will find out, though, is that meeting this unlikely street urchin will probably be the best thing to ever happen to him.**_

**Chapter 1 "I won't hurt you"**

The cold bites at me as I tighten my scarf around my neck, the wind throwing flakes of snow into my face and eyes every so often. 'The blizzard is getting close.' I hoped it would pass quickly and not damage my beystadium outside my mansion. Yes, it is my mansion now, thanks to my dirty-rotten grandfather being arrested along with that purple haired freak Boris. It was actually cool, having those two gone, but also, weirdly annoying, if not overly obnoxious.

I ponder to myself about my other numerous heirlooms as I walk down a semi-busy street. A couple cars were skittering around, and a few people were braving the cold on the sidewalk. The sight of dark steps and dark doorways lined with black handrails being repeated over and over agian gave off a depressing feel, which is perfect for this part of town. Why was I walking alone on the 'bad streets'? Because I felt like taking a walk, and I could easily handle myself. If I could survive being tormented in my childhood back at the Abby, then I could certianly survive being pestered by a few long looks and drunken bums.

I turn a corner getting on the street to start heading home when I hear it, like a high pitched scream echoing through the allyways. I immediatly turn agian and head toward the sound, back the way I had come, which is a natural impulse for me, defender-of-the-weak and all that crap. That, and the sound of screams just irks me deep, bringing back horrible memories and ushering me on to get away. I always turned away from that instinct though, always thinking that someone was being hooked up to machines or being whipped and that kind of stuff. I know it's irrational. but old habits die hard, and this one was putting up a hell of a fight.

I heard hooting and laughter up ahead, then the sound of glass breaking. 'Drunks probably.' I round another corner into an allyway, the sounds of gang party getting louder. I turn right and there they are, three or four guys dressed in rags, dirt caked on their faces, and bottles of beer in every one of their hands except one, which looked like he was standing over something. I was about to turn away, discusted, when I hear the guy say something and a small whimper cry from something else. 'Don't tell me they're beating animals.' That sort of thing always ticked me off, and I contradicted my earlier desicion and strode toward them.

"What's going on?" I ask, arms crossed over my chest, Mr. Calm, Cool, and Collected.

The one stooped over turns to me and I nearly retch at the sight of his swollen, yellow, puffy-eyed face. He definatly did more that drink, you could see that. The guy instantly got mad and glared at me.

"Who'sa hell are ya?!" he yells into my face, nearly staggering off his feet. It took every inch of my will power to keep from making a face at his rank breath, which smelled like a mix of alcohol, chewing tobacco, and rotten food. Nice.

I glare back at him. "Answer my question."

The man frowns and motions to the men around us, all drunk as monkeys, and as crazy as loons.

"We's are just'a haphen a lil' f'un, dat's all."

I scowl more and lean to gaze behind him, trying to see what poor creature he and his band of carrion brothers were tormenting. Whatever it was, it was quiet now, and hidden behind a couple boxes. I turn back to the man, voice stone.

"Why don't you leave whatever animal your messing with alone."

I swear that guy looked at me like I just asked him if he was God. Dumbfounded. After a moment, he chokes out a gurgle/cough laugh and shrugs.

"We's ain't beet'n no anim'l. Jus' my own lil' pleytoy." he says, turning to stoop down agian, facing his 'playtoy'. "Ain't dat right s'eethart?"he slurrs between his yellow teeth, reaching out to touch whatever he was talking to. I narrowed my eyes for only a milisecond when a thought dawned on me.

'What a minute, sweetheart? No...he wouldn't...'

I stride forward, pushing drunken henchmen out of my way as I go to the ringleader. 'That's what I thought!' It wasn't an animal this guy was tormenting, it was a girl. He stroked her arm which was covering her face and she let out a whine that made the drunk smile. THAT pissed me off. Without thinking, I had whipped out my weapon and launched it straight at the man. Dranzer grazed his outstreatched arm, making him howl, and then whizzed by me, taking care of the others. It only took a few seconds. and many bloody gashes and gouges later until they hauled ass. I waited until they had long disappeared to pick up Dranzer and put him back in my jacket. With them gone, I turned my attention to the girl, still cowering in her little ball, arms over her head, quiet sobs shaking her tiny frame. 'Either that or she's shivering' I noted. The baggy, used-to-be-white t-shirt and thin, brownish, three sizes too big slacks that hung limply from her body couldn't have offered much warmth. I though of the comming snow storm and mentaly winced. Such a storm could make her freeze to death and I didn't particuarlly want that to happen. I softly crouched infront of the girl and gently place my hand on her bare shoulder, one that poked through the neck of her shirt. She immediatly flinched away like I had burnt her, letting out a tiny terrified squeak in the process.

"I won't hurt you." I tell her, not in a crooning voice, I didn't croon, but it was a nonthreatening one nethertheless.

She doesn't make a move, so I just waited patiently, waiting. After a few moments, probably realizing I wasn't here for blood, or at least hers, she shifts. Her arms lower, revealing a head of grease locked brown hair, followed shortly by a face. She turns and looks at me and I almost stop breathing. Sure, the bruises and cuts and dirt on her face was definantly horrible and painfull to look at, and made pity swell in my chest, but that wasn't what my gaze was locked on, kept me from breathing.

I was locked on her eyes,

Her eyes were beautiful, shining, glowing, agianst her beaten exterior. They were the strangest shade of blue. Gray-blue, like the color of a fine mist from the ocean, clouds of rain after a long drought, a chip of stone from the most majestic of mountians. They held a deepness, a depth, I'd never seen before. They held emotions like banners: pain, fear, hope...all of it was there, so easy to read.

A blow of chilling crystals on my face breaks my trance, and my mind starts running agian. She still looks at me, but this time I carefully avoid her gaze and assess her condition with growing distaste. Dirt, blood, mud, snow all mixed and caked onto her skin. I could easily tell that her body was pale under all that dirt, and skinny. She didn't have bones jutting out of her, but she was definantly underweight, and it was overwhelmingly obvious that she wasn't just some girl who had gotten pissed at her parents and ran away from home. She had been out here for a while, though I refused to ponder how long that might have been. 'She'll die out here.' I thought, then an idea came to my mind, and nearly shuttered away from it because it didn't sound like me at all: the cold, heartless, unyeilding Kai. But, looking at her, decrepid, alone, abused.... I just couldn't make myself walk away and leave her here. I took a few moments to prepare myself, then raised my head and looked at her in the face.

"A blizzard is comming tonight, you'll die if you dont find shelter." I start off.

No responce.

"If you want a place to stay, I can help find you one."

She blinks.

I sigh, exhasperated. She either didn't understand what I was asking her, or just flat out didn't care. 'I'm TRYING to help you damn it!' I mentally growl and just blurt it out.

"Do you want to stay at my place for the night? Get cleaned up and eat?"

Gods I've gone soft. I was almost too embarassed at myself, and afraid, to look into her eyes agian, but my pride had been growning steadily weaker the past several years, so I didn't mind THAT much. So I forced myself to meet her gaze... and I was suprised at what I found on her features. Suspicion. Why is she suspicious at me? I'm offering her help for gods sakes. I mean, I can understand why she would be, but I just freaking saved her butt from four very drunk hobo's who were probably going to sexually harass her to say it mildly. She COULD cut me a little slack and thank me. My usually titanic patience was about to run out, quick, when suddenly another idea popped itself into my brain. I stared at her a few more seconds to see if she would do more before shrugging and getting up, her eyes following me as I went about brushing caked on snow off my black cargo pants.

"Have it your way." I say in a care-free tone before turning and walking away, feeling her eyes boring holes into my back the whole way, before I rounded the corner, heading back to the street. A few seconds, I'm almost at the opening of the ally when I hear distinct, tiny, rapid footsteps behind me, then the tug on my jacket as she grabbed the sleeve. I gave myself an almost invisible triumphant smirk, and walked into the street to head home.


	2. What's your name?

**A/N Hi people!!!! Just taking the time to say that, not even a day old, this story has already had 4 reviews and favorites. That is COOL!!! I spazzed when I opened my e-mail to find 10 messages from about reviews and favorites. So THANK YOU to those who already contributed their opinions on my (what I thought was crappy) story. You guys make a girl feel loved. ^_^ Anywho, ON WITH THE STORY!!!!**

**Chapter 2 "Whats your name?"**

It was late before we reached my street, thankfully free of pedestrians. Passers-by have not been friendly on our way home, shooting looks at the girl, then at me, moving hastily out of the way when we encountered a crowd, parting like the Red Sea. You would think we contained a plauge or something. Others just ignored us completely or whispered speedily to their friends while motioning, not to secretly, toward us. I had to lock my jaw and clench my fists to keep myself from punching somebody. I did NOT tolerate disrespect. Well....disrespect toward the innocent at least. If somebody dissed Boris, heck, I'd join in, but that's beside the point. The girl seemed to notice the suspicious glares too, 'cause she would constantly try to hide behind me, and I could see her watching everyone out of the corner of my eye. Pity floated up in me agian. She was clearly resented, classified as a dirty, drug dealing bum, yet that wasn't true at all, as far as I knew. Always living in fear. Fear of starving. Fear of lbeing caught alone. Fear of being beaten. Fear of almost everything. People like her had enough to worry about without city smits making it worse. I could rant about it if I wanted.

I turned into my driveway and I heard her gasp behind me. I look at her and saw that she was staring at my home. Her reaction confused me at first, but a second later, common sense jumped in. She probably thought I was the richest person in the world, which I kinda was. Not to be offencive to all you non-speciallypriveliged people of course. I'd never really looked my house before, actually LOOKED, but with her here, I saw everything. Three stories of dark brick. A full wooden porch in the back by a pool and beystadium. Five windows on either side of my ten foot oak door, the bottom two being humongous twelve by eights. Greenery everywhere. Trees, lush grass speckled with white giving backdrop to the cobblestone of the driveway that let up to a three car garage. I don't know how I overlooked all this for so long, but apparently I had.

I walked her up the driveway and the three steps leading to the front door, her clutching my arm still. I drug out my key, turned the lock, and stepped inside. If she wasn't awed enough just by the outside, she was truely awed now. My house is huge, so everything in it is huge. Huge kitchen, huge living room, huge couches, flat screens, chandeliers, tables...and this was technically only one room, for the livingroom and kitchen in front of us was joined. The girl's eyes were saucers as she took in everything, softly brushing her fingertips along the forest green walls, probably checking if they were real. I heard shuffling from upstairs and a short, older woman appeared at the top of the staircase, which faced away from us.

"Master Kai? Is that you?"

Mrs. Gladys, my one-and-only maid, came down the stairs, donning her usual apron-on-floral-dress combo.

"I was starting to get worried. I was about to...Who is this?"

Mrs. Gladys blinked as she looked at the girl, who just now moved behind me agian. The girl shifted nervously as Mrs. Gladys gives a small smile, turning to me for an explanation.

"A blizzard is comming tonight." I state simply, knowing she would understand.

Mrs. Gladys nods her head, her grey puff of hair bouncing, and turns back to the girl.

"My, my! She's dirty!" she says, comming up to us. "I'm Mrs. Gladys, but you can call me Gladie,"

Mrs. Gladys smiles reassuringly and I feel the girl loosen her grip on my arm the tinyest bit.

"Here Master Kai, I'll take...." She stops, blinks, then looks pointedly at me agian.

I shrug, not knowing the girls name.

"Well, I'll take her to get cleaned up." She continued, detaching the girl, who looked like she was ready to kick AWOL any minute now, from me. "And you can go and fix yourself something to eat."

Mrs. Gladys smiles and while turning away, girl in tow, whispers almost inaudiably, "We'll talk about this later." before heading back up the stairs. I knew what she ment. She wanted to know why the girl was so mutilated. You would think that she would be more interested in why I brought home a girl in the fist place, but Mrs. Gladys was used to me bringing home lost or injured animals for a night or two 'cause, let's face it, I just have a small soft spot for animals, and she probably saw the girl as the same thing, a dear creature of the Earth in need of help. Ok...that sounded wierd. Note to self:Never repeat that again.

I watched them until they disappeared over the balcony before heading to the kitchen, pulling out a couple eggs, crutons. hamburger meat, and sauce for meatloaf. I didn't feel like making anything special. I wont bore you with all the oh-so-interesting details. It was done cooking about 45 minutes later and Mrs. Gladys and the girl still hadn't come down yet. 'What the hell is taking them so long?' I sigh and deside to wait for them, 'cause I'm just a gentleman. Well, I FINALLY hear the upstairs bathroom door open, and I hear Mrs. Gladys say an apology to me.

"I just couldn't find something for her to wear. She's so tiny that not even my clothes fit her. I'll go out tonight and find some cute outfits for her after dinner."

Mrs. Gladys morphs into the kitchen, all smiles as usual, pulling the reluctant girl behind her. I was amazed at how much better the girl looked, free of dirt and dried blood, hair clean and still glistening wet, old cuts and scratches tended to. Event the bruises on her face didn't look as menacing as they had before. I knew she felt better, her eyes bright, open, excited when I looked at them, and I nearly stopped breathing agian. I'll have to watch out for that.

"Well I hope your hungry." Mrs. Gladys chimes to the girl.

She opens her mouth to answer when a growl erupts from her stomach. she swiftly covers her angry abdomen and blushes like mad, making me almost laugh outloud. Mrs. Gladys did though, and the girl smiles a tiny sheepish smile at her. 'She looks so cute when she smiles like that. Wait...did I just think that? I must be sick or something.'

"Well lets eat then! No need to make you wait!" Mrs. Gladys giggles, immediatly lightening the mood.

* * *

Dinner was good. I had offered the girl a seat (I'm a gentleman, remember?) which she took, and I sat in a seat next to her. I could have sat on the other side if I had wanted, but I felt like sitting near her, which is really wierd considering that I usually sat AWAY from people. Anywho, food was passed out and we ate in silence. I was suprised at how slowly the girl ate. I would have thought she would have eaten her first serving in ten seconds flat considering how hungry she must be, but she proved me wrong. She had quite good manners, and I caught on that she would copy me sometimes when she thought I wasn't looking. We finished and Mrs. Gladys had gone off to the store just like she said, leaving reluctantly when the girl made it clear with her reaction, that she didn't want to go along. I couldn't blame her after how people looked at her on the way home, which is probably a part of the reason why she declined. When I had cleaned and put up all the china into the cabinets, the girl had disappeared. I looked around but found her nowhere. The livingroom, bedrooms, bathrooms, the library, study, dining rooms, were all empty. I checked everywhere, and after a while, I was begining to worry that she had left. She was no where inside the house, so the only place she could be...'The porch! Why didn't I think of that sooner? 'Cause I'm a dumbass.' I answer myself, walking through the livingroom to the back porch window, and there she was, sitting on the bench by the wall, covered with little snow flakes. I walk out to join her.

She looks up and smiles at me as I brush snow off the other side of the bench and take a seat, arms crossed and eyes closed. I tried to enjoy the quiet, but the slight brush of her leg agianst mine was impossible to ignore. I open an eye and see her looking over the yard, pool, distant mountians, all the color or winter. I had been so drawn to her face that I didn't even notice she was wearing Mrs. Gladys' plain white pants and pale blue turtle neck sweater, both of which looking two sizes to big. She looked great in them anyway. 'What? No! Damn it Kai! Pull yourself together!' But no matter how I tried to deny it, Dranzer just pops in and chirps in his annoying know-it-all voice.

_'Just admit it...you dig her.'_

'Do not' I counter.

_'Do to.'_ 'Do not.' _'Do to.' _' If you don't shut up bird...'

He snickers but leaves my mind. 'Thank gods.'

I didn't realize the girl staring at me until I came back to earth. Those internal conversations kinda make you zone out from time to time. I saw the question in her eyes and replied simply.

"Nothing."

She seemed to accept that and turned away, gazing out into the vastness agian. It wasn't until then that I still had no idea what her name was.

"What's your name?" I questioned lightly, turning my head to look out over the scenic vastness that had caught her eye, but instead of appreciating the veiw, my gaze meandered to peer at her from the corner of my eye.

She turned back to me, question in her eyes agian. I repeat myself and then recognition colors her gaze.

"Mesa." she replies simply.

**A/N Ok, another authors note. If your wondering how 'Mesa' is pronounced, the 'e' is like the 'e' in 'street' or 'feet'. The original spelling is 'Misa' I think, but that looked like it should be a name from Star Wars, so I changed it. Also, the next chapter will be more exciting, trust me!**


	3. You don't know?

**A/N Ello agian! Just a quick but IMPORTANT note. I may not be able to update soon after this. I'm grounded, and I dont know when I will be able to get back on agian. I will however, type up chapters whenever possible when my parents are gone, so maybe I'll add a new chapter in a while. Just hang tight! Thank you! **

**Chapter 3 "You dont know?"**

Ok, I admit it, I liked her name. It was the most beautiful name I'd ever heard. 'Victoria', 'Kimberly', 'Diane', they sounded so regal and over thought. 'Mesa' was simple yet strong, not complicated and ageless. Was that cheesy or what? I never knew I had it in me.

My secret wonder must have shown on my face, because Mesa let out a tiny chuckle and turned away. I quickly recovered my composure, stunned that I had let emotion play on my features so easily. This past tournament had apparently changed me, and not for the better. I close my eyes agian, and decide to start asking questions, curiosity bugging at my head.

"Where are you from?" I begin non to formally.

I feel Mesa shrug beside me, and I wait a few moments before asking sonething else.

"Have you always lived out here?" refering to her being on the streets.

A pause, then I hear her mutter a tiny yes.

"Where are your parents?" I ask, brow furrowed.

She shrugs, and that answer forced my eyes open to see her staring at her swinging feet absently.

"You don't know?" The confusion and suprise in me leaked over.

She shook her head and continued staring, obviously not liking her answer. I didn't like it either. I question her more though, about her childhood, friends, family she knew, everything...only to get the same answer from her every time. She just didn't have anyone she knew, or liked for that matter. Her childhood seemed more like a survival contest than a life. She explained in soft, short, sentences about how she would scavenge in dumpsters, take shelter in boxes or storm drains, hide when a gang or older person walked by, always fearing for her life. She told of long, hard, winters in sewers, spending the night with roaches and rats, the pain of going hungry, the sores and scars she carried, the feeling of exile, of being bound, not knowing if she would live through the night. My heart ached for her. No, not ached, bled for her; her pain, her fear, her loneliness. It sounded horrible, brutal. I had no idea that the story of her life would be filled with so many sad stones, blocking the happyness that should have been hers. Was the world really that cruel? Evil even? Ignoring ones in need, people who had lost everything, kids and children who had no where else to go, and had nothing else to do besides wait to die. And she spoke in a tone that didn't fit her story at all, a dull tone that bit into my heart. A tone that made this seem like some normal conversation instead of a depressing confession. Her whole issue was worse than I first imagined.

Mesa's heart was bruised black and blue, hurt beyond repair, and it showed. Her eyes held so much emotion, feelings she had kept inside herself, building up for so long, that when her gaze shifted to me, it ripped my body appart, leaving bare, bloody wounds that only she and I could see. Right then, nothing mattered besides her, and I was suprised to feel my body move without my mind's consent and it wrapped my arms around her small, shaking shoulders. The dam broke then, and tears fell down her face. My mind watched as my body brought her closer, nearly into my lap, and let her cry into my shirt, tears darkening the black fabric. I was to busy to care that I was letting my guard down, letting my soft side show for the whole world to see. With such a helpless person crying her hurt and pain on to me, nothing else mattered, nothing except the feel of her damp hair agianst my stroking hand.

* * *

I had no idea how long we stayed like that; hours maybe? Her tears had dried a long time ago, but the feeling of loss still radiated from her body in sad waves. I should of made her go inside so her wet hair wouldn't give her a cold, but that seemed irrelavent now, and I still had her wrapped in my arms, sheilding her from the growing wind. I eventually had to shift her awake from her trance; the weather was holding true to its purpose, and I didn't want to be caught out here when the storm hit. Reluctantly, we got up and swiftly went inside, my still-possessed body keeping my hand on the small of her back. We both had flakes stuck to our clothes and hair which I brushed off, creating a small pile on the floormat. Mesa didn't shift, head hung tiredly on her shoulders. Without a word, I led her to the couch and she laid down, taking off the blanket that was drapped along the back, and wrapped up, head resting on a small pillow. I paused, then grabbed another blanket from the nearby loveseat and put it over her, just incase one wasn't enough. I looked at the grandfather clock across the room and read 10:32. It was late, but decided to wait for Mrs. Gladys to come back, which I hoped was soon. I stood and, after giving one last glance at Mesa's exhausted form, headed torward the front of the house to stare through the window at the dark street outside. It looked serene, even with flakes of snow and ice whirling and twirling in an angry dance, lighting up like sequens under streetlights which were few and far between. Of course, this is when you-know-who desided it was a good time to pop up and say hi.

_'Something's wrong with you!' _Dranzer sings in my mind, smuggness dripping from his annoying, bird voice.

'No there's not.'

_'Then explain Mesa.'_

Crap.

'There's nothing to explain.' I tell him, annoyed.

_'Right, 'cause you hugging random girls is just a normal part of your personality.'_

'Shut it bird.' I threat angerly. 'There is nothing going on.'

_'Liar, liar, pants of fire....'_

That tore it.

'Shut up already!' I praticilly yelled at him.

I was officially off my rocker now. Can you really blame me?

_'Then just admit it.'_

'Admit what?' I ask cautiously, suspicion brewing.

_'You like her...!' _he croons.

I could see his face in my head now, smiling like a maniac and all that gay crap.

'Damn bird, get out of my head!'

_'Na Na na Na Na NA!' _Dranzer laughs, obviously enjoying himself, which in my book, is just pure evil.

I sigh, giving up and let the howling of the wind outside drown out his idiot nagging. Good thing for me that that was when I saw Mrs. Gladys's car pull up the drive. I gave a silent thanks to the gods and walk outside to help her. We quickly say greetings, which almost get lost to the wind, and take the three or so bags she brought into the house, ice stinging our skin and eyes the whole way. I could tell she went balistic by the sheer weight of the bags and how big a smile she wore on her face. Once we were safely inside, Mrs. Gladys took the bags greedily from me and headed upstairs, saying that the clothes were as much as a surprise for me as they were for Mesa. Lets just say that made me SLIGHTLY suspicious.

Just for you to know, my body was still in that weird 'possessed' state. Want to know why? 'Cause my mind wanted to go upstairs to bed, but my body turned the other way. I went to the couch, Mesa in exhausted sleep upon it, and swiftly scooped her into my arms. I shifted my arms slightly, and she was so tired, she didn't even groan, and her unbrushed brown hair fell over her closed eyes like a rumbled curtian. My hands would have brushed the hair away if they were able. I got my bearings and carried her bridal-style up the staircase, seeming to weigh no more than ten pounds in my arms. I heard bustling in one of the guest rooms, so I followed the noise down the picture-framed hallway, the maroon rug under my feet silencing my footsteps, until I reached a slightly open door at the end of the hall on the left, light squeezing through the opening to land on the hardwoood floor and rug. I knocked twice with the toe of my boot and heard Mrs. Gladys suddenly start rushing to get, what I guessed, all the clothes she had bought into the closet. I waited and after a minute, she opens the door.

"Yes Master Kai?"

I motion to my burden and she nods, letting me in. The room was bright and open, only a large queen-sized bed, dresser, and a bathroom and closet door to interupt the peach colored walls. Mrs. Gladys followed me to the bed and pulled back the light green comforter as I laid Mesa down, her head lolling to the side, mind lost in slumber. I step back as the older woman covers her up, and it took all my might not to brush Mesa's hair from her face. Thankfully, she ushered herself and I quickly out of the room and shut the door behind us, giving me a sense of relief.

"I'll tell you where she got her injuries in the morning." I tell her and walk to my own room just down the hall, locking myself inside.

The past few hours had been strange, exciting, and tiring, and now I wanted to think. 'What exactly was going on with me?' I thought as I slowly started to regain control over my body, no longer possessed. 'And why is that happening?' I sigh, pull off my shirt and boots, turn off the light, and get into bed, the soft brush of the black sheets reminding me of my exhaustion. 'I'll think tomorrow...' Slowly my eyes drifted closed, blocking out my room's plain white walls, and let the sound of the wind outside whisper me to sleep.


	4. I don't like her!

**A/N OMG PEOPLE I'M BACK! Ok, not completely, but I can type up my chapters agian! My grades are on the rise, so my mom gave me a little slack. I know your all like "SHUT UP AND POST ALREADY!!" I will as soon as I can. I have to make it up to you guys for being patient and waiting on me. But now I will shut up and let you get on with the next chapter!**

**Chapter 4 "I dont like her!"**

"Come on Dranzer! Faster!"

Dranzer obeys, racing around a cinderblock, zig-zaging through some aluminum cans, then stops at my feet, finishing a near perfect run. I pick him up, content with my training for the day so far, and sit down to rest for a moment.

The storm had blown over quickly last night, just like I had hoped, though it left a hell of a lot of snow in it's wake. It took me nearly an hour to shovel all of it off my training area, but the effort had warmed me up, a pretty difficult thing to do at five o'clock in the morning in the beggining of December. Winters here are harsh.

I had been practicing for several hours, keeping myself busy so I wouldn't have to think, but rest could give nothing to occupy my mind, so think I did. 'The storm is over, I gave Mesa shelter, I held my promise.' It hurt to think of it. Why does it hurt? Because now Mesa will leave, and oddly enough, I didn't really want her to go. Last night still rung fresh in my mind, and I could still feel the weight of her burden on my shoulders from when I had held her. She had spilled out everything to me, a complete stranger, and for what? One night of sanctuary, only to go out agian to weather an even colder night alone? That's not right. If fact, it was down right cruel. But I had no excuse to make her stay, and my pride was not used to tolerating prolonged generocity.

"I dont know..." I sigh to myself, running a hand through my hair, a habit I picked up after I had changed it's style.

Sure, my hair was still it's 'natural' two-toned blue, only now the lighter part was only partially made up, so most of it fell around my eyes. And my face paint is gone too. I only where it during competitions now.

I shake my head and force myself to stand, resting time over, and ready Dranzer agian. I launch and run the course agian. And agian, and agian, indecision fueling my body. Before I knew it, the smell of food reaches me, and stops my endless cycle. In the quiet I hear pans clanging, bacon sizzling, and Mrs. Gladys singing some cheesy 80's song completely out of tune. Smiling at my only maid's ungodly soprano abilities, I pick up Dranzer, call it a day, and head inside.

"Hellooo Master Kaiii!" she sings, a grin nearly breaking her cheeks.

I plug up my ears and pretend to look in pain.

"Oh hush." she says, batting my hand lightly with a spatula, trying to look hurt, but humor still shone in her eyes.

I grin, lowering my hands, and walk over to help.

"We're having eggs and bacon if that's alright with you, Master Kai."

"It's fine." I reply, grabbing a bowl and whisk, grin still lingering slightly on my lips.

I always felt relaxed in Mrs. Gladys' company, which of whom is just basicly a sixteen year old with really gray hair.

"I'm glad that storm blew over as fast as it did." she said over the stove, spatula in hand and oil stained apron wrapped around her waist, agian wearing floral underneath. "I thought we would have snow up to our necks."

I nod my aggreement, cracking a couple eggs into my bowl, AFTER I washed my hands mind you. I didn't feel like boring you with that little detail, and I half figured that such an action would be common sense to you. We cooked in silence for a while, just enjoying the quiet. In the back of my head, I felt that Dranzer wanted to say something, but one mental glare from me kept him quiet. I was still peeved at him for all his little comments yesterday. There were a few more enjoyable moments of peace, then Mrs. Gladys got on the ball.

"So...are you going to tell me?"

I drew in a deep breath to calm myself down. I did NOT want to talk about this right now, so, acting like the freaking TEENAGER I am, I stalled.

"Tell you what?" I question like I didn't know EXACTLY what she wanted to hear.

"Dont lie to me Master Kai, you know very well what I'm talking about."

"She just had a couple cuts and bruises. No big deal." I say, trying to close the subject.

Silence.

Then,"That's not all..."

I look up at her.

"What do you mean?"

If she had looked pained before, her face looked truely pained now.

"She has more than a couple scratches on her Master Kai."

I blink and turn back to what I was doing, perplexion nagging at me slightly.

"More? What else did she have?" I ask, not understanding.

Mrs. Gladys didn't remove her gaze from me.

"Burns and rashes on her upper arms, they've been rubbed raw. Blood blisters on her palms. Small scars all over her body, centering around her shoulders and wrists..."

"Wait, when did you find this out?"

"Yesterday, when I took her to get a bath."

I looked at her, horror growing in my chest. I tried my best to keep it off my face, out of my voice.

"She was surrounded by a few drunks when I found her. You dont think...?" I veered off.

"She got mobbed?" Mrs. Gladys finishes. "Probably, maybe more."

I look absently down at the bowl in my hands, eggs a liquidy yellow glob in it's center. My mind's eye saw a nasty picture in my head, of those drunks all getting on top of Mesa, doing revolting things to her, touching her in a way that made even MY skin crawl, rendering her more helpless than she already had been. Just the mere THOUGHT of someone doing that to her, or anyone, made bile and anger rise in my throat, and I struggled to swallow them both down.

"She'll die out there wont she?"

The silence that followed was enough answer for both of us. Minutes ticked by slowly, the distant clock a dull, monotone knell.

"Is she still asleep?" I ask after what felt like eternity as I set the finished food on the table.

"I think so. She must have been exhausted to have passed out like that last night."

"She was telling me...Well....We talked about alot of stuff. Okay, she talked about stuff. I just listened the whole time."

"I see...." Mrs. Gladys said, putting dirty dishes into the sink to be washed. "What did you talk about?"

"Nothing much." I lied.

I did not feel the need, or the want, to tell her anything. What occured last night was secret, intimate, private. Mesa's confession was heartbreaking, and something that must be kept just between me and her.

We sat down and ate in silence as the sun rose steadily above the trees, though it was still relatively early in the morning. Mesa never came down for breakfast, and I was uncharacteristically worried about her.

"Did she leave?" I ask, trying to make it sound like it didn't really matter to me.

Mrs. Gladys looks at me, a strange gleam in her eye.

"Are you worried?"

"No." I reply sternly, lying through my teeth.

She pondered that for a moment.

"Do you want her to leave?" she continued.

"No!" I basicly yell at her, gripping the table.

I blinked and turned sharply away from her surprised face, releaseing the table from my fingers. I knew that she was just as stunned by my sudden outburst as I was. She stayed quiet for a long time, thankfully long enough for my embarassment to fade from my cheeks, but it still hung inside me, naggings and persistant.

"I'll go get her." she says before abandoning the stiff atmosphere of the kitchen, leaving me relieved and confused.

My questions from last night suddenly pounce to my attention agian, and I still had no idea what the answers to them were. 'Something's wrong with me. Mesa's changing me.' That fact rose fear inside me. Yes, fear. I was afraid to change, to become someone different than what my grandfather had molded me to be, to loose my sense of self. I didn't what my way of thinking to change, my personality to change, my heart to change. 'There is only one Kai Hiwatari, and he can't disappear.' I tell myself. 'I've held out this long, through pain and disappointment, through revenge and victory, and I will NOT change now, not because of some stupid girl!' My pride whispered and chanted to me, and my old wall started to build itself around me agian, just like before.

"I kept my promise, I don't need to do anything more." I growl, standing.

I turn and abruptly leave the room. I feel Dranzer pop into my mind, and I could sense his uncertianty.

'What are you doing?' he asks slowly, almost hesitantly.

'Leaving.'

'What about Mesa?'

'What about her? She can leave now.' I tell him as my feet take me to the front door, intending to just walk away from my troubles.

'You want her to leave?'

I don't answer.

'Did last night mean nothing?'

I ignored him.

'So you just dont care about her anymore?' he pressures.

I stop, hand on the knob.

'What are you trying to get at!?' I snarl at him.

'You can't just abandon her you know.'

'Watch me...'

I jerk the nob and step outside into the bitter cold.

'Did you helping her mean nothing at all?'

'She lived through the night.' I reply, walking briskly away from the house.

'Did her confessions not touch you?'

'I've been through worse...' I sneer, just to piss him off.

It worked.

'Did you holding her and comforting her not affect you at all!?'

I keep walking, and I could tell Dranzer had had it.

'So your just going to pretend that you don't like her!

I pause, half way to the street, and answer him.

'I...don't...like...her.'

'You know that's a lie.'

'I DON'T like her!' I repeat, hands clenched.

'You sure? 'Cause to me it feels like you do.'

'You don't know what the hell your thinking!'

'Neither do you.'

That tore it.

'Leave me the hell alone!' I yell and completely push him from my mind, running now toward town, anger pushing me on.

'Damn bird, always telling me what to do!'

I growl and grind my teeth, feeling like I could take on a thousand man army as crowds of people rush past me in a blur. I didn't care where I was going, and I just continued to run blindly until pure exhaustion finally made me stop some time later. I leaned heavily agianst a wall, breaths short and ragged, and look back the way I had come. I was miles away now, in the most congested part of town. I was lucky to even stumble upon an abandoned allyway to find sanctuary in this place. Cars screeched and horns blew, bodys sardines, mashed together on the sidewalks. Typical city life here in the middle of Moscow.

I sigh and slide down the wall, back agianst the cold bricks. I felt tired, physically and emotionally, and the last of my anger had been spent, leaving an empty shell behind. I rested my arms on my knees and let my head fall back so I stared at the sky. 'What am I doing...Why did I run away like that?' I thought of Mrs. Gladys comming back down stairs to find me gone, and the guilt at having to make her her worry. But I needed to think, to clear my head, get my emotions under control, and I wouldn't, couldn't, return home until I had reached a decision. I gave a deep breath to steady my frayed nerves, closed my eyes, and let my questions and feelings draw me from the world.


	5. I want you to stay

**A/N Ok people, the next chapter is here! Also, I have planned to upload at least 1 chapter every weekend, so now you have something to look forward too! I dont have much news other than that, so I'll just shut up now. ^_^ On With The Fic!**

**Chapter 5 "I want you to stay."**

I huddled inside myself, concentrating only on the decision at hand, filing through the pros and cons, my wants and my needs, reviewing every possible reason and senario to having her stay or leave. One half of me wanted her gone, to never see her agian. That side hated how weak I had become, how kind I was letting myself be. It was the side that Boris had molded me into all those years ago, the old Kai: power hungry, cold hearted, lonely. This Kai was yelling at me, ordering me, demanding me.

_'What has happened to you!? You've grown careless, pathetic, allowing others to get to you, to change you. And worse than that, a FEMALE! As if you could be more ignorant!' He ranted._

There was a moment of pause before he continued, anger and hate coloring his words thickly.

_'You lowered your defences and let them, HER, in! Your so called 'friends', they are pointless, a waste of time. You've got all the power you need already, in yourself. Yet you impaired that strength by letting your emotions slide through.'_

Old Kai paused again as my mind filled with memories, dark memories: The Abby, Black Dranzer, the tournament.... Moments that had permanently changed my life, tried to lead it to the worst. The images, and the feelings that they brought with them hurt, excrushiatingly, yet Old Kai wasn't done.

_'This girl is blocking you Kai...' he whispered, hard and piercing, '...keeping you from your true potential. She has hindered you, turned you soft, yeilding, useless. Get rid of her, forget her, destroy her, and return to the path you were always ment to be on, the path you were destined to travel on. How else will your dream come to pass?'_

Another picture appeared before me then, a picture of me surrounded by thousands of people, holding my blade high in triumph as I stood over a beaten and defeated Tyson, Dragoon laying in pieces before him.

'I only want to win agianst Tyson...' I say, shaking the oppressing image from my mind. 'Not crush him. My days of searching for supreme power are over.'

_'Not over...' he croons to me, '...just stalled. You can still be the best, be champion. You only have to leave your friends and that Mesa character behind. Them, and the emotions they bring only hinder you.'_

After that, quite suddenly, the sinister presence of Old Kai suprisingly vanishes, another presence and image comming to mind, only this one was of my own accord. It was of Mesa grinning sheepishly at me before dinner yesterday, when her stomach betrayed her in a nonflattering way. I smiled, a happy calm suddenly and quickly spreading over me.

'What if I dont want to leave her behind?' I ask as the image fades, and Old Kai returns.

_'That is not an option.' he snips at me. 'She brings out emotions in you best left untouched. You know how they make you weak.'_

'I know better now.'

Old Kai didn't relent.

_'You have to waste time and strength to protect her.' he says, bringing back a memory of the first time I saw her, helpless, cold, beaten below the towering figures of the drunks, grinning like jackles._

'I dont mind.' I reply calmly, simpily.

The image disappears.

_'She uses you for her own needs.'_

No image appeared this time, bur I could feel the weight of her in my arms, the wetness of my shirt as she had cried, and could only guess at what I was being reminded of.

'She needed someone to lean on.'

I could tell Old Kai was becoming pissed by the way anger radiated through my mind and dripped from his words.

_'She steals your home and clothes and makes you into her personal slave!' he yells, anger bombarding me from all around._

A final image appears before my eyes, and my heart swelled involuntarilly. The image was of Mesa asleep in my arms as I had carried her to bed, face so soft and peaceful with small strands of hair falling over her closed eyes. That image gave me sudden strength, a strength I didn't know I had, and it made me fight back.

'I am no one's slave.' I say, confidence and pride fueling my words. 'Mesa needed help, and I gave it to her of my own choice. And you know what? I would do it agian, as many times as she needs.'

_'She's poisoning your mind!'_

'She's not poisoning me, she's bettering me. She's helping me open doors I've never dared to touch. She's making me do things I should have done long ago. The Old Kai is long gone, and no one can bring him back and make Mesa leave. That is final.'

I felt a part of me crumble. A jumbled, broken mess fading from my life once and for all, the Old Kai being taken down with it. A new energy engulfed me, one of victory and enlightenment as I blinked open my eyes, returning to the real world. I was proud of my most recent accomplishment, more proud than I can ever say. The answer had come so easily, having been right in front of me. 'Dranzer had been right.' I realized, and guild tugged at my throat as I recalled how I had treated him just this morning. I reached out slowly with my mind to find him, hoping he would listen to me.

'Dranzer?' I call out softly.

Nothing.

'Dranzer...?' I call agian.

Silence.

'Come on Dranzer, please...?'

A long, tense moment passed, then I feel the familiar brush of Dranzer's mind as it touched mine.

'What.' he asked distantly, hurt still seeping off him.

Now that he had answered me, I suddenly didn't know what to say, where to start.

'Dranzer, I...'

I sigh, completely uncomfortable, and just blurted it out.

'You were right.'

Embarassment flooded my face as I continued slowly.

'I guess I should have listened to you.'

That is the closest to an apology I could get, and I hoped that Dranzer would take it. There was silence for a long time, and when he didn't answer, my hope fell. I opened by eyes slowly and, almost painfully, stood up, brushed snow off my pants, and took the first looming step towards home. Depression was just starting to set in, when I feel Dranzer brush my mind agian.

'Told you I'm always right.' Dranzer pipes in, mockery in his voice.

I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, to stunned to move. People absently skirted around me angerly, calling me an 'idiot', but I didn't really hear them. I smiled to myself, literally glowing on the edges, and a new sense of respect and bond washed over me at his forgiveness.

'Thanks...' I say to him, all my feeling of relief in that one word.

'No prob...'

Contentment warmed me up on the inside, pushing away the bite of cold in the wind. I tightened my scarf around my neck and started walking down the street to head home. It was only then that I realized how low the sun was, and confusion swept over me. 'How long was I out?' I asked the nearest person for the time and was suprised by his responce.

"Four o'three." he said before turning away after bidding a polite farewell, returning to his bussying around.

'Four o'clock?' I thought stunned. 'I just sat there for that long?'

I asked three or four more random people for the time, all answering the same. I must have really been out of it if seven hours went by in just a few minutes. Mrs. Gladys is probably going crazy with worry now.' Shaking my head, I start for home, pushing my way through the crowds clogging up the market place. After a long while, and lots of pushing and shoving, I stepped to the side for a much needed breather. Gods the air was musty! Even here in the open, sweat, perfume, fruit, and gods know what else still fogged up my senses. The stench itself was about to make me head off for home agian when something on the shelf of a nearby booth on my right caught my eye. Inable to supress my interested curiosity, I make my way slowly to the small shop and peer at the item that had distracted me with a skillfull eye.

"That'll be 7,062 rubles."

I look up and was greeted by the face of, who I guessed, was the shopowner, who's hands I immediatly noticed seemed to tiny and thin compared to the rest of his body. He motioned to the object with a bright, selling smile.

"Quite ah work o'art ain't it?" his mustache quivered. "Completely handmade with only the purest o'jewels. It would make ah nice gift for ah lady friend o'yours."

I nodded at him and contemplated the item agian, this time intentionally. After a few moments of speculation and pondering, I look up at the man agian.

"I'll take it."

The owner gave a little whistle of approval.

"A'right then. Ah'll wrap this up for yeh."

He took the item delicatlly in his miniature hands, wrapping it up in multipul layers of soft, white cloth as I fished in my pocket for my wallet. I pulled the leather holder out and gave him my severely underused, nearly expired, credit card. He smiled, scanned it, then handed my card and the gift back to me.

"Thank yeh! An come agian!" he called as I left the booth.

I stuffed my wallet and card back in my pants pocket while keeping my prize from being crushed by ungulating bodies as I headed out of the market place. I finally made it back home after around an hour of walking to find Mrs. Gladys pacing on the front steps, a look of angered worry on her face. She saw me comming up the drive, and even from a hundred feet away, I could tell she was relieved beyond all reason as she ran to greet me. She took me in an embrace and hugged me tight, nearly crushing what I just bought as she muttered over and over how glad she was that I came back.

"I was so worried Master Kai! When I came back downstairs to find you gone...oh I'm just happy to see you safe!"

She let go then and stood arms length from me, continuing, her wrinkled features suddenly turning hard.

"And you are in so much trouble for that little stunt, young man. Where, in all of Russia, did you go?" she demanded, voice stern.

"I just had to get something real quick."

She looked skeptically, her eyes screaming 'And it took you _seven hours_ to get it!?' as we headed for the house.

"Well, what did you get?" she finally said, her piercing eyes now on the package in my hand.

I shrugged and carefully unvield what I had bought. Mrs. Gladys gave a tiny gasp.

"Why Master Kai, why did you get that? It looks so expensive."

"I dont really know." I replied truthfully. "I kinda just felt like I needed to get it."

"Well, why dont you give it to Mesa. It will cheer her up." the woman suggested.

That caught me off guard.

"Cheer her up?" I ask, confused.

Mrs. Gladys looks at me sadly.

"She got very upset when we discovered you missing and went and locked herself in her room. I have a feeling that she blames herself for your leaving."

My throat tightened.

"Why would she think that?" I ask as we walked up the front stairs.

"I dont know." she replies quietly, opening the door and stepping inside.

I follow silently, shutting the door behind me. Mrs. Gladys looks at me pointedly and motions upstairs with her head. I rewrap the gift in my hand then slowly follows her instruction, my steps ackingly unhurried. I was terrified at not knowing what I would find in Mesa's room, and I had absolutely no idea how I was going to deal with it. I stopped in front of her door, listening intently, but no sound met my ears, and there was no light comming from under the door. I wanted so badly to tell myself that she simply wasn't there, but, in a wierd way, I could almost feel her inside, and the gentlemanly side of me just couldn't ignore her more than it already had. I took a deep breath as I forced my fingers around the bronze knob, prayed to the gods for strength, and opened the door. The room was completely dark except for a small night light on a nightstand by the head of the bed, who's illuminating yellow glow lightly showed Mesa's huddled form on the bed. She didn't move. I shut the door quietly, stuffing the gift into my pocket for the moment and made my way to her, my chest swelling when I recognized that she was in the same balled up position she had been in when I had found her in only yesterday...head covered by spindly arms. And just like yesterday, I knelt down infront of her and placed my hand gently on her shoulder. She came to life under my touch and removed her arms to gaze at me, her beautiful grey orbs dark and dull. The possesed state came agian, and it made me softly uncurl her from her definsive ball and sit her next to me, my hand still resting on her shoulder. It was obvious she had not been outside the house, or this room, all day, for she was still in, what I assumed, was her pj's, a silk white tanktop and fuzzy light blue pants. Guilt overcame me then. 'How could I have made her worry over me?' I thought, the silence in the room dense and strangely secure.

"It's not you..." I whisper to her, feeling the need to perserve the quiet.

She didn't look at me for a long time.

"I can leave if...if you want." she finally whispered back, voice nearly breaking.

"No, no. It had nothing to do with you, I swear. I just...needed to get out for a while. Settle some things." I explained, hoping she would accept my white-lie.

She, unfortunately, didn't seem to believe me, for she shook her head. I sigh quietly, gathered my courage, then voiced the words that had been in my head since my 'inlightenment'.

"I want you to stay."

The truth in my own words suprised even me as she turned to stare at me, eyed burrowing, searching.

"Really..." I continue, giving my small, secret, rare, smile.

Her eyes seemed to brighten and, at that moment, I knew that everything was going to be ok. The weight of my gift grew considerably in my pocket and I took it out, rewrapped in its decorative paper. I gazed at Mesa from the corner of my eye and offered it to her. She just stared at me, looking taken aback. I smile even more at her obvious confusion and, after some encouragement, she took it in her tiny hands. She began to carefully unwrap it, her slim fingers moving as if she was afraid that it was going to suddenly leap out of her hand. It felt like an eterninty before she finally unvieled what rested in her palm. Her eyes grew round in amazement as she delicatly raised the fragile looking piece of art to eye level. What she held was a gem and jewel studded bracelet as big around as her entire palm, it's stones shining every color of yellow, pink, and white, with a tiny talisman of sorts shaped like a water droplet resting on top. Misty blue eyes turned to me.

"I....is this...m...mine...?" she stuttered out, wonder in her gaze and words.

I nodded and slowly, a huge smile broke her face. As quick as lightning, she threw her arms around me, pulling me into a very tight, unexpected hug. Suprisingly, I smiled, and hugged her back, my heart warming. I had probably just given her the most beautiful and expensive thing she had ever set eyes on, and now it was her's to keep.

"Do you want to stay?" I ask a final time.

She just nodded into my shoulder, and very suddenly, started to cry. If I had just been given a home, food, shelter, and companionship after a life long exile, I probably would have cried too.

**A/NHow was that? I didn't really like this chapter all too much. I think it went faster than it should have, but I'm not rewriting it agian. Anywho, just as a little note, Rubles is Russian currency, and one US dollar = roughly 28 rubles. Accordingly, 7,062 rubles = about $250 in US currency. Just thought I'd let you know. ^_^**


	6. Tell you what?

**A/N Woot! New chapter! Ok, I just wanted to take a moment and say thank you to all my readers for their wonderful reviews and to those who have favorited this story. It makes me feel so special! ^_^ But enough about me, I know you'd rather read the newest chapter, so I'll let you. OWTF! **

**Chapter 6 "Tell you what?" **

I dont really know what happened after that; it seemed like days melted together and individual events and actions passed by in a blur, so I was dumbfounded when I asked Mrs. Gladys for the date.

"It's the 20th." she said, back to me as she washed the dishes we just used for breakfast.

"The 20th?"

"You seem suprised Master Kai. That's understandable, seeing how distracted you have been the past couple weeks."

"Still, last time I checked, it was the 1st. Where did the last three weeks go?" I ponder to her, standing with my back to the kitchen doorway.

"Nowhere." Mrs. Gladys turns to look at me, a great smile on her face. "You've just had your eyes glued to Mesa. Thats all."

"I did not have my eyes on her Gladys." I say sternly, expecting to shut her up.

"You dont see what I see!"she sings in her awful soprano. "Your attention is wrapped around her like a bun 'round a hotdog."

"Nice analogy..." I grumble sarcasticlly, embarassment flaming up.

'Was I really that out of it?'

'Yep!' says you-know-who. 'And it's funny watching you too, just staring at Mesa like a mutt eyes steak.'

'What's up with everyone compairing me to meat today...'

'Actually, you would be the mutt.' he chirps, supressing giggles.

'Whatever.' I reply, which only causes him to giggle more.

I left the kitchen and walked over to where Mesa sat on the couch flipping channels. She looks up at me and smiles, making my attitude warm up instantly. Though nothing major happened since the night she decided to stay, Mesa had openned up considerably, more than I had imagened. To start, she talked more often now, and I soon found out that she voiced her opinion alot, especially at things on the news. I also learned that she is quite skilled in the kitchen too, especially for someone who had never worked in a kitchen a single day in her life. She loved puzzles and brain benders, ALOT. I gave her one of my 5,000 piece puzzles, the one of the Eiffel Tower that I had aquired from my grandfather, and let her mess around with it. She spent eight hours straight working on that thing. Eight! And would you believe that she finished it in just under two and a half days? Yep. She had quite the powerful mind. Nothing could occupy her for as long or as intently, except for one thing...beyblade. She seemed completely mesmerized by it and she would come outside in freezing weather at the crack of dawn just to watch me practice. It all started when she happened to wake up just later than me, while I was getting ready to head outside. She wanted to watch, to see what it was that I did every morning, and I let her. From then on, she would wake up early and just sit there and ask questions about the sport, techniques, abilities, tactics, anything that I knew, she wanted to know. It didn't bother me a bit. I was glad that she seemed so excited about it, and that little prospect kind of held my attention. Mesa was disappointed today because I did not train this morning. Mrs. Gladys had said something about going to town today, so I thought I'd just wait and see what she had planned for us.

Well I sat down beside Mesa, resting my feet on the coffee table, and said goodmorning to her, having forgotten to this morning. Whoops...

"Morning!" she replies, eyes just as bright and happy as ever. I cant help but grin back at her. Her estatic glow never failed to suprise me.

"What are you so happy about?" I asked, figuring that she was excited about whatever Mrs. Gladys had planned for us.

"We're going shopping!"

I blinked and my grin faded.

"Shopping...?"

She nods and I groan, turning away. I absolutely, undoubtedly HATED shopping. Sure, the outrages prices and the prolonged walking was fine. I could handle that. People on the other hand...

"Whyyyyy.........?" I dragged out.

"For Christmas you dingy." she giggles. "It's only four days away you know."

"Four days!?" I practically yell, shooting up in my suprise. "It's only four days away!?" I tell her as I gave her a wide eyed glare. "Why didn't you tell me!?"

Now I know what your wondering. 'Why is Kai freaking out? It's not like he forgot to buy gifts or anything.' Well...funny thing that is. You see...ok FINE. I forgot to buy gifts, for everybody, alright. Happy? Sheesh. I know I'm probably the only loser on the face of the planet who forgot to get gifts for the only two people he cared to buy for. So much for being perfect...

Mesa just kinda sat there for a moment, an astounded look on her face before she litarlly exploded in laughter.

"You forgot Christmas was comming up!?" she choked out inbetween fits.

That's all I needed. Some former homeless girl laughing her head off at my stupidity. You have NO idea how degrading that is. So in true Kai style, I responded by saying absolutely nothing and crossing my arms. I would not give Mesa the satisfaction of calling me stupid.

'But she didn't.' piped Dranzer.

'It was close enough.'

I sighed and got up, desperate to get away from my humiliation. Mesa, still in the lingering ends of her perposterous laughter turns to gaze at me, failing to smother her amusement completely.

"If you want to go, you better dress up."

She smiled and nearly leaped off the couch, running up the grand stairs in a noisy excited clatter. Only Mesa could call me stupid, then laugh at me about it, and still live. I just hoped that she knew just how damn lucky she was.

'I can't believe I'm doing this.'

Just to inform you of my perdicament, I was just being stalked by a number of rabid/deranged fangirls, forcing me to seek sanctuary with Mesa and Mrs. Gladys inside a very upscale and very crowded clothing store where almost everyone just HAD to stop and drag me into a conversation about a bunch of crap I don't care about. Blah blah money blah politics blah blah blah...The list just went on. I swear this little shopping spree is going to turn me insane. I blame my families overwhelming popularity and wealth. Lucky for me, we didn't stay there long, and (after dodging the awaiting fangirl mob outside) relocated to a more private store not far away that was, thankfully, crowd free. The girls had a great time there, looking through racks of clothes and playing dress up with eachother, giggling and laughing as they tried on outfits and jewelery just for the heck of it. When I was away from stuck up rich people and smothering fans, I actually semi enjoyed myself, relishing in my own personal peace and getting a kick or two out of Mesa and Gladys. We spent hours out, walking and shopping, excluding me of course. And it was only when it became dark that we could see the gathering's lights in the distance, and the sound of laughter, clown music, and games.

"Carnival!"

Before I knew what she was talking about, I had Mesa leeched on to my arm, eyes glittering up at me.

"Can we go? Please, please, Please!?"

It took a moment for my heart to restart, and an even longer moment to tear my gaze away from hers, a pretty hard thing to do mind you.

"Sure."

Mesa grinned and jumped in the air, nearly dislocating my shoulder and started to drag me away, leaving poor Mrs. Gladys, who was, to my disappointment and embarassment, laughing histarically at us, in the dust. Mesa led me torward one of the various ticket booths lined infront of the entrance while I tried to keep my arm in one piece. We came up to a booth which was occpied by a tall pot-bellied man who was wearing a pair of very unfasionable rainbow suspenders.

"How many?" he asked in a deep, gravely voice.

"Two."

"112 rubles."

I took out my wallet for the first time that day (amazing isn't it?) and handed him the pay. He gave us two plain paper wristbands to wear showing we had paid, and before I could even give Mesa her's, she had started dragging me agian. Gods did that girl have energy! I basically had to yank her to get her to stop, and even then, she was bouncing on her feet, making the act of putting on her wristband quite difficult.

"I'm in a carnival! I can't believe I'm in a carnival!" she practically yelled.

"Haven't you been in a carnival before?" I yelled back, people and game sounds drowning out my voice.

"Nope!" she yelled back like it was no biggie.

I had just put on her bracelet when she pulled me off agian, toward a wack-a-mole booth.

'This is going to be a long night.'

A few hours, two cotton candies, and one suffed animal later, Mesa was finally losing steam, walking randomly between game booths she had already visited. I followed her, thankful for the slower pace and a couple seconds to myself. How many times can a person be thanked and hugged in one day? I didn't know, but I was pretty sure Mesa broke a record or two. She just had the time of her life here, eating candy, playing games...you couldn't tell her she wasn't enjoying herself. She would just meander around, looking wide eyed at all the lights and sounds and people, clutching the stuffed grey and white striped kitten I had won for her. Yes, I played a childs game to win her a toy. Why? 'Cause I'm just nice that way, so you can quit laughing now.

"Kai!"

Mesa shakes me out of my daydream and points to something.

"Lets go!"

"Go where...?" I say, coming back to reality.

"Up there!" she replies, pointing agian.

This time I follow, and see what she wanted to ride so badly.

"The ferris wheel?"

She nods her head.

I look at my watch real quick and guessed that we could go on one more ride. Mrs. Gladys (whom I had no Idea where the heck she was) could find us if it was time to go. The crowd was shrinking, so it wouldn't be that difficult I'd hope. I turn back to Mesa, who was staring in quiet excpectancy, awaiting my answer I think.

"Just this one..."

Mesa grinned and gave me my ten hundreth hug that day, followed by my heart stopping for the ten hundreth time. Mesa thanked me and dragged me over to the waiting line before my heart could even recover, which it did with some difficulty eventually. I would have to tell her to quit doing that. Those hugs of her's were killing me.

So we waited in line, whis is always full of excitement and action (note my sarcasm), and in about two minutes, both Mesa and I were being locked inside the caged bucket, which was rocking violently due to Mesa's bouncing again. A sound buzzed and then we started to move, up, up, up. I was looking outside the window down at the spectators below and switched my gaze to Mesa, expecting to see her kneeling on the bench and looking outside as well. But she wasn't. She was staring at me, intently.

"So tell me." She said quietly, not breaking her gaze which had captured mine.

"Tell you what?"

"I told you about me, so it's only fair you tell me about you."

It took me a moment to realize what she was talking about.

"Why?" I ask, trying to stall.

"I want to know." was her simple reply.

I sighed and used much effort to look down at my lap. I did NOT, more than anything, want to tell her about this. This kind of thing was only for me to know. But, I also knew that I did owe it to her, and that she wouldn't stop asking me until I caved, so fighting would be pointless. There was no escaping it now.

"Alright." I said, and she scooted closer, sitting right beside me now, eyes piercing as I braced myself, gathering the courage to tell her about the past I wished I could forget.


	7. There's nothing to tell

**A/N Ello agian! I just have a few notes to share with you. I'm sorry that this chapter is so late in comming. This week I have been busy with school studying for exams. I know fun right? Anywho, I will make it up to you by updating as much as I can during my two weeks off for Christmas and New Years by writing at least two chapters a week if not more. Also, I do not know if I can garentee one chapter a week like I used to. The class in which I USED to write is over and I'm changing to a different class entirely, so I may not have time to write at school like I used to. I do not know if this is set in stone yet, but I wouldn't get to cocky. I love you guys but my schooling has to come first. I guess that is it for now. **

**Chapter 7 "There's nothing to tell..."**

I take I deep breath, nerves fraying.

"There's nothing to tell..." I try to sway her, but of course, Mesa would not buy it.

She just continued to stare in a way that reflected her curiosity perfectly. There was no escape for me now.

Sighing, I begin. "Well, my mother and father were huge beyblade jockys, and they traveled alot. They just had to be at the center of every manufacturing company or magazine publisher or whatever. They were egotistical and thought highly of themselves, using their fame to cheat others out of what they had earned." I said the last sentence with special distain which didn't go unnoticed. Mesa tilted her head slightly, seeming to absorb every word I told her, and continued. "I was born while they were on an important business trip in Berlin. I guess you could say that I was an 'unexpected complication'. I dont know what they did about that, but I remember staying at the house with my grandfather and grandmother while they were away, which was basicly all the time. My grandparents were not as intralled in the sport as their younglings, but they did have a finger or two in a couple businesses. Voltaire, my...grandfather," I muttered out,"owned a blading school on the outskirts of town while my grandmother Alyona owned a couple blading shops in the heart of Moscow." I said, lightening up a little.

Mesa blinked and asked."You sound like you dont like your grandparents at all."

I nod. "Well, I dont really care for Voltaire." I basically spit out his name. "But Nana Alyona, well everyone loved her."

"Even you?" she questioned lightly.

I nodded agian, a small smile accenting my lips. "Yeah. I did. More than anyone. She was more of a family to me than either Voltare or my parents." Unexpectedly, a chuckle escaped from me.

"Whats so funny?"

"Nothing, I just remembered something. You see, Nana Alyona always treated me special: buying gifts, making desserts, reading stories...well the night before my 5th birthday, she came and woke me up in the middle of the night and ushered me outta bed. I didn't know what she was doing but she led me outside without even letting me change out of my jams, and told me to close my eyes. I did and she guided me around the back yard a little bit, then had me stop. She told me to open my eyes, and do you know what I saw?"

"What!?" she said, getting excited.

"My own personal beystadium. It was huge! Like 30 feet long! And it had a beydish, training course and everything. It was only the next day that she gave me my first beyblade..." I stopped, emotion choking my words. I took a breather. "She made up for my parents not being there, for never sending me anything for any of my birthdays. I didn't care about them though. Nana Alyona gave me the best gift ever."

Mesa smiled at me, and I felt us starting to desend in the bucket, going for another revolution.

"She seems really nice."

"She was..." I whisper back.

My tone of voice caught her off guard.

"What do you mean by was?" she inquires. "Isn't she still nice now?"

"No..." I reply simply. "She's dead."

Mesa sucked in a breath, and looked at me sort of guilty, like she had offended me in some way.

"I...I'm so sorry. I didn't mean..."

"It's alright. You didn't know, like it matters anyway." I turn and look out the window. "She died a long time ago."

Mesa muttered a small 'oh...' and turned away too, as if her and I were too shy to address eachother through the sullen atmosphere. It was only when we reached the troph of the ride and started up agian slowly that I continued.

"After she died the following year, everything started going down hill."

I pushed myself to tell her of how, after Nana Alyona's death, Voltaire sort of became the dictator of my family. I told her of how he had sent me to his blading school, Balkov Abbey, with me under the impression that I was going to be trained to be the best blader I could be, which unfortunatelly, was the truth. Tales of rigorous tests, training, and disipline clouded my words, and how I had to hold my tounge as I watched 'unworthy' students be punished or imprisoned for their weakness, unable to escape from that frozen hell. 6 years of torture spilled from me, and my dormant anger grew with each phrase I uttered.

"After enduring so many years of pain and fear, I decided that enough was enough."

She listened quietly as I explained how I had escaped under the cover of darkness and snow after a monster of a freeze cracked the lock on one of the old rusty steel doors that led to the abbeys unused courtyard outside..

"I'm sure that they realized I was gone by morning. But by then, I was long gone."

The story from then on was familiar. I snuck myself onto a large, crowded passenger plane and ended up flying to Japan, not that I cared where I was going, as long as it was away from HIM. That was where I made a small name for myself as I became the leader of a gang called the Blade Skarks, and for a good while, I occupied myself with collecting blade parts and defeating opponents.

"That was the only thing I knew how to do."

Mesa nodded in understanding and I moved on. On to when I first met Tyson, and how we ended up facing eachother on more than one occasion. On to when Max and Ray joined our new formed team, the Blade Breakers, with me as their leader. I narrorated how angery I was at having to watch over 'a bunch of childeren' when I could be bettering my own skills instead of helping them. My story when through battle after battle, past the 'Black Dranzer' insident on the lake in Russia, and the defining moments when I lost Dranzer twice, and Tyson's defining battle agianst Zeo. I entered more recent events, such as the last world championship where I fought agianst Tyson and Dragoon for the title, and The BEGA tournament that was brought on by the return of that foul little piece of shit Boris.

"After Boris was arrested, I returned home with nothing else better to do than keep Mrs. Gladys company and hone my skills even more." I ended shortly.

I felt very tired. It had taken all my will power to open up to her. And even though it was the hardest thing I'd ever done, I was glad that I did. 'Mesa deserved to know more about me after she told me about herself only a few weeks back.' Suddenly, the strangest sensation came over me as I thought about her, a mix of want and terror, a strange combination I know. Either willfully or not, I sat up and turned my gaze to Mesa's. There my eyes locked on to her's, and everything seemed to fade as her features were brought into strong focus: her short dusty brown hair, a strand or two playing on her brow. I noticed little things, like the tone of her skin, a soft looking shade of peach, the slight upward curve of her eyes that was just suddle enough to be missed, but pronounced enough that it gave an exotic look to her, her cheeks, covered in ghost freckels and flushed pink from the cold, her lips that always slid gracefully into a smile, and her eyes...her amazing mountian cloud, foggy rain, ocean wind eyes... bright and open, yet still secluded and thoughtfull, and easily the most captivating thing about her. Every aspect of her held me, and I did not even feel my head as it tilt slowly to the side, and seemed to pull her closer. I still didn't register what was happening even when she responded by copying me, drawing nearer and nearer. I felt her breath on my face, and I instinctivly leaned in. Mesa must have realized what was happening for she looked as if she suddenly regained herself, and just as swiftly, snapped away from me, releasing me from my trance. I was breathing hard, though I didn't know why, and I could tell Mesa was too, even with her back to me. Creepingly, heat washed my face and realization of what had almost occured struck me into an akward silence that neither of us broke. I turned away to hide and gazed out the window as the ride continued on with out so much as a tink. We rode for one more revolution in complete quiet until we finally exited the bucket and headed off to find Mrs. Gladys, and even then, the stiffness in the air did not let up, and we kept a good amount of space between us. Amazingly, Dranzer was quiet as well. We soon found my hairbrained maid watching someone getting their fortune told and made it back to the car (which is a simple silver mini coup if I failed to mention). made conversation with us, though Mesa and I didn't say a word to eachother. We got home, went inside and bid us good night and went to her room just outside the first floor's livingroom. Mesa and I asended the stairs and I escorted her to her room like a gentleman should. We stood for a moment, not knowing what to say for a long time.

"Thanks..."she finally whispered, uneasy, not looking at me.

I didn't look at her either, keeping my gaze carefully on the hallway's walls.

"No problem. It was just a few bucks." I mutter.

"No."

I blink and look up to see that she had turned her gaze to me.

"Thanks for telling me. It helps." she says, then abruptly turns and enters her room and shuts the door, leaving me even more confused than ever.

**A/NHow was that? That seemed really rushed to me though. But hay, I got a little romance part in there! Tune in for the next chapter! **


	8. Merry Christmas to all

**A/N My ever faithfull readers, I just want to take another moment to apologize for the lack of updates. To keep from pissing any of my readers off, I will upload when I can and try not to make excuses agian for my absence. I hope that you will still read and review and bring my spirits up a little. But enough of my being emo, and let us get to what we really care about. **

**Chapter 8 "Merry Christmas to all..."**

The next morning was an odd one for me, though only Dranzer and myself were aware of it. Mrs. Gladys still had no idea of what Mesa and I did, or almost did, the night before, and I was planning on keeping it that way. Not only did I not know what I was doing then, but I probably wouldn't have realized what was going on if Mesa hadn't jumped, for some strange unexplainable reason. Thankfully, Dranzer had kept his beak shut about the whole embarassing scene, or at least so far he had. There was no telling with him. He could just turn around and spit it back in my face at any darn moment. Damn bird...

I sighed, ran a hand through my dishelved hair, and rubbed my temples. I was unusually tired, and my waking up at five-thirty had nothing to do with it. My mind seemed weighed down as I sat there half dressed and extreamly out of it on my bed. Was I sick? I'd never felt this horrible before; exhausted, confused, and whatever other emotions I felt that I couldn't quite identify. I cast my gaze over to my window and absently searched for a sun that had not yet risen. 'What am I doing?' Puzzling memories raced competitively in my head, jousting for my full attention. So many things had happened to me in a short amount of time. It was unreal.

'Your losing it.' chirped Dranzer, suprisingly not his giggle-till-you-piss self.

'I'm not crazy.' I countered, to tired to feel irritated.

'Well, if your not going crazy, then she must be controling you.'

I was about to throw out a pun when I stopped and actually thought about it, the way Mesa's eyes would always seem to trap me, how I would pretty much go with whatever she wanted, and suddenly, I began to question that she might very well be. The thought was disturbing, and I quickly brushed it off for the sake of my own sanity. I could feel that Dranzer wanted to say something, and I mentaly asked him what was up. He hesitated for a moment before answering me.

'Last night...' he began.

Uh oh.

'That was kinda wierd.'

'Your telling me.' I mocked and forced myself to get up and stretch, waking my body up a little.

'So you...saw?' I asked, almost mournfully.

He stayed silent for a moment, then muttered, 'Yeah...'

I blinked, suprised by his normal answer. 'So...what? Aren't you going to make some smart ass comment or rub it in my face a little?'

'Nah...' was his only reply.

Sort of dazed by his actually being CONSIDERATE for once, I slipped one of my many plain black t-shirts over my head and walked out the door. Didn't have a need to pull on pants, I wore my baggy cargos to bed, so no changing there. I hadn't of felt like dressing properly for sleep last night anyway, so you guys can just deal with it. I quietly shut my door and walk down the hall, pausing only breifly at Mesa's door, which was still closed and dark underneith. I could only wonder how she thought about last night, and if she would talk to me today. I hoped that she would. I needed answers from her, and her odd goodnight was still ringing clearly in my head..

'Thank you.' I heard in my mind. 'It helps...'

What did she mean by ' it helped'? Helped with what?To whom? The whole affair hurt my head and made me want to, like, rip something.

I reached the bottom of the staircase and swiftly put on my leather jacket and head outside, wind and frost greeting me. I still had yet to buy gifts, and with only 2 days to go, I needed to get on the ball. So I slowly started making my way in the general direction of the local market, felt my jacket for the wallet I had left in it yesterday, and mentaly prepared myself for the busy, crowded, noisy streets of Moscow.

***

For your own sake, I will skip the whole shopping-and-nearly-getting-run-over-by-a-drunk part. Trust me, it's nothing you wanna hear. And I'll skip the rest of that day too, and the next if you dont mind. Why skip TWO FREAKING DAYS? Because those days were hell. Thats why. Not only was I feeling akward about the whole nearly-kiss thing, but Mrs. Gladys and Mesa were completely fine. COMPLETELY...I mean. When I had come back after my sort-of-worth-it present trip, Mesa basicly rammed into me when I was barely in the front door and smiled the biggest damn smile I had seen that day, and went on to be her usual freaking bubbly self. Did she not feel wierd at ALL!?!? I had felt like slapping the freaking sunshine outta her for the past 48 HOURS because she was so freaking happy... And did Mrs. Gladys help me or give me any sympathy at all? No. Infact, she made it worse. And let me tell you, being tortured by two estatic females all day with no one to talk to seriously besides the magical, smart alick, spirit bird inside your HEAD who would just turn around and throw it right back into your face ten fold... Well, that's not fun. And knowing that God ignored all my prayers to kill me was just icing on this freaking cake. See what I mean? I pratically going MAD, and my ranting to you should be evidence enough for that.

Alright, glad that's over. I feel much better now, so no worries. Oh, and just to let you know, my Christmas mission to the market WAS a success, partially. I actually found desent gifts that left my wallet unsuprisingly light. I'm not going to tell you what I got just yet though. I'm more interested in seeing your, and thier, reactions on Christmas.

"Kai! They're done!"

Mesa's call wakes me up from my daze. Slightly still out of it, I get up off the couch and switch the tv off, lightly pondering what the deranged girl was calling for me this time. Sighing, I walk to the kitchen, hands in my pockets, and, to my not-so-surprise, get blasted by the scent of cookies well before I meet up with her by the oven. She opens the door for me to see inside, and I nod silently (still feeling lingeringly wierd around her), confirming that the batch was finished baking. Mesa's face breaks out in a smile (as usual) and she grabs some small oven rags to pick up the pan while I fetched glaze from where it was stored in a bowl in the opposite counter.

"Alright...." I force myself to order. ".... just set them ontop of the stove and we'll..."

"Ahh!"

I swiftly turn at Mesa's sudden exclaimation and drop my bowl back onto the counter with a clatter.

"What happened!?" I demand, anger quickly rising as I reach her.

"I got the top rack..." she replied sadly.

I let out a low growl, and look at the arm she was holding. There,about half way up on the underside of her forearm was a nice red streak about two inches long where she got burned. I immediately turn her to the sink and stick her arm under the running faucet, making her hiss with discomfort.

"Why did you do that?" I scolded her, trying to deaden the burn.

"I didn't mean to. I was just trying to get the pan out." she answered feebly.

"It's an oven!" I scold harder, astounded by her stupidity. " What did you expect? Igloos?"

"I'm sorry..."

I pause, then look over at her to find that she was staring at her arm absently, small pain tears wetting her eyes. My thoat closed up painfully, and I immediatly felt guilty, but the remainder of my fear still fueled my words.

"Just...dont do it agian." I ordered lightly and turned the faucet off.

She nodded solemly as I dried off the wound and let her arm go. I felt bad for snapping at her, but the last thing I needed, or wanted, was Mesa burning her hand off. It's wierd logic I know, but it's just me.

Mesa watched as I, unlike her, carefully removed the cookie filled pan from the bottom rack, turned the oven off, placed the cookies on another rack to cool, then set about decorating a set of star and moon shaped delectibles that had already cooled. Mesa pulled up a chair to sit right beside me and took up an icing bag of her own. Both of us stayed silent for a long while, enjoying the quiet that accompanied Mrs. Gladys leaving to shop, and finished up the first set quickly, setting them aside to make room for the newly cooled batch. We picked up our bags agian, but this time, Mesa didn't start. I glance at her, but she didn't meet my gaze. She just kinda stared at the table, deep in thought.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked softly, retrieving a star and putting it on my decorating plate.

She looked at me for a second, and shook her head and picked up a cookie.

"Nothing." she said unconvincingly as she began to slowly work.

I rejoined her, and there was a minute or two of silence before I spoke agian.

"What did you mean last night?"

Mesa turned to me with a confused look on her face.

"What are you talking about?"

"When you said that, 'it helped'. What did you mean by that? What did I help?"

Mesa swiftly turned away, looking embarassed of all things.

"It helped me to...understand you more."

I blinked, sort of suprised, and continued to look at her. She kept her eyes on her work.

"Your very strange to me...." she continued, voice carefully low. ".... and it's hard for me to find things out about you."

She finally turned to me, eyes searching.

"I dont know what you like or dislike, the places you may want to see, or what you want to be when you grow up.... I dont know what your opinion is on things, or your ideas for the future. You dont open up alot, and it makes me wonder, like if you really like..."

She stopped then, blush darkening her cheeks, and turned away again, concentrating on her art. I turned away too, not fully satisfied by her answer, 'cause I felt like there was something else that she wasn't telling me, but I was certian that I wouldn't get much more out of her now. With nothing much else to do, I began to work agian, and we stayed in tipsy silence until Mrs. Gladys came back a couple hours later, the end of Christmas Eve upon us. The night was late, and the many burning candles that Mrs. Gladys had set randomly 'round the living room cast a warm glow upon the walls, and gave us just a little more light than we needed to see. Mrs. Gladys, Mesa, and I set our huge plate piled high with our previously made delicious treats on a dark wood table near the front door, which glistened with a yellow garland glow. Our wrapped gifts had been placed on the ground underneith it, for there was no point in breaking out our tree when the stash was so small. We stood there, all three of us, and gazed in silence at our little 'altar' as we called it, a warm feeling brewing. I personally had a feeling of anticipation, though it wasn't because I was excited about receiveing gifts myself. I looked to my left at Mrs. Gladys who looked utterly at peace, eyes closed, a small thankful smile upon her lips. And to my right ,Mesa, face half hidden by her hair, had her eyes alight with supressed excitement that reflected the flames of the candles around her. Contentment dreamily flooded me as I took it all in. This was my family, just the three of us, and it was nearly Christmas Day. I was stunned by how happy I felt, thankful even, and I had a nitch that tomarrow would be extraordinarily special, more special than any other day in my life. I couldn't wait until it got here.

"Merry Christmas to all..." I whispered softly, "and to all a good night."

**A/NOk, I know that that wasn't the most exciting chapter you have read, but hopefully the next will make up for some of it. Please review, and look forward to the next chapter!**


	9. It's finally Christmas!

**A/NOk peoples! Here's the next chapter! And I hope you guys still like even though it's short. I think you will though. You better, or I'll hunt you down and stuff a raccoon down your pants. MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! :D **

**Chapter 9 "It's finally Christmas!"**

Christmas morning was slow in comming and I hardly slept a wink. Anxiety kept me awake, and I had to content myself with reading a book or laying silently on my bed and staring at the wall. It was all very dull. Luckly, it wasn't long after dawn that I realized I wasn't the only one awake. At exactly eight o'clock, as if she had planned to wait all night just for the prospect of waking me up, footsteps thudded down the hall in a run, a bang erupted on my door, and Mesa popped her bright excited face into my room.

**"OH MY GODS! IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!"**

Mesa let out a joyfilled squeal then, in like .25 seconds, hurled into me, nearly knocking me to the floor with her entergetic hug.

"I can't believe it! It's finally here! It's finally Christmas!" she exclaimed, all smiles, and bounced on her feet while still managing to hold onto me (who is currently suffering from heart failure).

After a second or two, she finally let go, except for one hand, and allowed me to breathe as she just stared at my exasperated face, grinning from ear to ear.

"Well your excited." I commented dryly , still trying to regain my composure.

She nodded rapidly and pulled on my hand.

"Come on! Let's go! Let's go!"

"Alright, alright." I struggle to say. "Just calm down. We'll go."

Mesa smiled wider if that was possible, and let go of my hand.

"I'll go get Gladys!" she said, then like a flash, ran out of my room and disappeared down the hall.

I couldn't help but chuckle at her excitement. This was probably her first Christmas ever, and she was just as bubbly as can be. I smile and silently shake my head, go to my dresser, pick out a, you guessed it, plain black t-shirt and slip it on. It was only then that I realized that Mesa had just hugged me when I, to my utter astonishment, half naked, my person only in a pair of blue sweats. That sudden flash of intuition spurred heat in my cheeks, and chargin rapidly filled me. Nervous, embarassed, and EXTREMELY self-conscious, I pace unhurried out of my room, shut the door, then shuffle down the hall, my mind lightly pondering weither or not Mesa herself had acutally noticed my 'night attire', or lack there of. Distantly, I could hear and Mesa's voices downstairs and, when I entered the vast living room, saw them sitting on the floor by our 'altar', content and happy, Mesa shivering in expectation. Chagrin still well in my system, I sit down quietly between the two and folded my arms, carefull to keep myself a respectful space between me and bouncing girl to my side.

"Alright! Now that we're all here..." Mrs. Gladys began, pulling out two gifts, handing one to Mesa, and one to me. "Lets open gifts!"

As you can tell, we didn't really waste time saying 'Merry Christmas' and all, as if we could with Mesa bouncing like a freaking rubber ball. But even then, Mesa hesitated when she touched her gift, and for a reason I didn't understand, looked at me instead, eyes intent. I sat frozen, watching her watch me, my body growing hotter and hotter with must have been longer than it felt, because had to nudge my present into my leg to get my attention agian and free me from Mesa's eyes.

"Why dont you open your gift first, Kai." she pushed softly.

I blink, then regain my composure and set my attention on the box that lay before me. It was gloriously wrapped in sparkling red paper and had an elaborate, gold, fabric bow on top. Clearly, something only Mrs. Gladys would put the time into. I ceremoniously untied the bow, detached the paper, and opened the box under it to find an expensive looking, yet simple dark green cashmire sweater. Agianst popular belief, black t-shirts are not the only things I wear. I'm usually just too lazy to put on anything else. I take the soft clothing in my hands, then slip it on, finding it a perfect fit. Oh, another thing that goes agianst what people think of me, I love simple gifts. Seems cheesy and sensitive right? Well, thats the truth. Ironic isn't it? I must get my love of cashmire from my father. He wore one in almost every picture I have of him, but that isn't the point. The point is that, between me, you, and the fence post, knew me too well. And I love her for it.

"Thank you." I say to her, and she nearly burst out of her apron by the size of the smile she gave me.

"Alright, your turn Mesa." she said, motioning to an equally stunning box infront on Mesa.

Agian, Mesa hesitated, but quickly began to unwrap, uncovering a similar box, glittering blue paper all around her. She wordlessly opened the box and pulled out a stunning blouse, a dimmed neon green with light purple, pink, and blue hearts, increasing in size as they neared the bottom. Mesa's eyes lit up as I watched her finger the soft looking fabric, and I couldn't help but imagine at how good she would look in it.

"Thank you...so much!" Mesa exclaimed and hugged , both girls smiling.

"Your very welcome." The older chuckled, clearly delighted. "Now..." said, standing up. "I'll start fixing you some breakfast."

"But dont you want to open your presents?" Mesa questioned, folding the blouse in such a way that you would think that it would break in her tiny hands..

"Yes, but I will let you two exchange gifts first. I can wait. Besides..." paused, and looked at me from the corner of her eye,"I'm sure you want to see what else you got."

Then, without another word, she left, leaving us alone. I swear, planned all of this. Sighing, I turn to Mesa who had picked out a simple wrapped ball of paper from under the 'altar' and placed it in her lap. Accordingly, I retreaved my own gift and we exchanged in silence. When I got mine, Mesa's excitement visually picked up agian, and she looked expectantly at me, smiling slightly. Knowing that she would force me to open her gift first if I tried to resist, I handle the wrinkled green paper ball in my hands, and untie the strings of ribbon that held the oddly wrapped present together. Suddenly, I grew considerably nervous, and cast a glance at Mesa from under my lashes. She nodded to me entergeticly, and I thought I detected a slight nervousness in her too. I swallow and take a deep breath, then slowly unfold the paper. What greeted me suprised me in the best ways. There, in a little bundle of handsewn fabric and string, was an almost exact, plushie replica of Dranzer. I picked up the little Dranzer almost delicately and looked at it astounded. It wasn't a masterpiece by any means, with visible stiching, a little mis proportoning and all, but it was by far better than any gift I had ever recieved. Even better than the huge beystadium Nana Alyona had given me all those years ago. Joy filling me, I turn to see Mesa beaming, smiling wider than I had ever seen her smile before. I could only imagine at how hard she had to work to make this for me, and the thought warmed me to no end. A strange emotion rose up and covered me from head to toe right then, and it was the greatest feeling in the world. Softly, I put Plushie Dranzer in my pocket, letting his head and wings proudly show.

"Thank you..." I whisper thankfully to her, and, if possible, she glew more.

'If she smiled like that from just watching me open her gift...' I ponder, thinking of all the ways she would react to opening my gift to her.

Wanting to know the full effect of my gift, I nod for her to open hers, and she did, being careful to not tear the spotted red and maroon paper that covered it. Under the paper cloak was a rectangular, medium sized box, about as big as my hand. As causiously as I had, she opened the box, and nearly dropped it from what she saw inside, the one thing I knew she had wanted more than anything in the world. In the box, layed a cobalt blue beyblade, with a matching launcher and ripcord. It was clearly a defencive style blade, knowing that that would be more her style, and there was an empty bitchip in the middle, for when she would find her fighting partner. I look from the box to her face, and she had not moved an inch, apparently stunned beyond belief. The sight made me smile. After a few more tense seconds, she, as slowly as a snail, lifted her hand and stroked the blade, marveling at its beauty. She turned to me, and her eyes said everything. They were brimming with tears, and the happyness and joy and wonder and all those other emotions leaped out from them and seemed to pierce me to the core. Suddenly, in a move to quick and unexpected, she put the box on the floor and leaped at me, enveloping me in a near bone crushing hug for the second time that day. The force of her body knocked me off balance and I land back first on the floor, with Mesa on top of me.

"Oh Kai, thank you so much! I cant believe...I had no idea...how could you..." Mesa rambled on and on into my sweater, making no sense at all and clung to me like a lifeline.

The prospect of my gift rendering Mesa nearly immobilized by amazement made me happy, thrilled even. Seceretly elated, I wrap my arms around her and just let her go on and on, not caring about being pinned on my back to the floor. Soft music seemed to play in my head, and I couldn't help but revel in the moment. Mesa quieted quickly, then turned her face to me, eyes and cheeks still wet. Convulsively, I reach my arm up and dry one of her tears, feeling her skin heat up from under my thumb. I vaugely noticed us closing distance, but this time, I knew exactly what was going on, what was about to happen. I leaned in and, to my suprise, Mesa did too. Closer...closer...closer....

_**!!CRASH!!**_

The sudden noise from the kitchen scared the crap outta me, and I swear, both me and Mesa launched, like, ten feet in the air, which ended up with me landing flat on my face and Mesa landing on her butt beside me. I swiftly turned my gaze up, glaring daggers at the kitchen door, ; voice calling out...

"SORRY!!!" She apologized, sounding almost as paniced as me. "It slipped."

And as if on que, a pan lid rolled lazily out the door, across the floor, bumped into a chair, wobbled, then came to a noisy halt on the other side of the room. Yep. is trying to kill me.** "Boy Hiwatari Dies From Heartattack By Hands Of Crazy Caregiver". **Hows that for headline news? I'm gonna have to talk to her about this REAL soon. Sighing in frustration, I sit up and look at Mesa, whos eyes where as wide as the moon, then, both of us burst out laughing, in a nervous I-thought-I-was-gonna-die way. We laughed for ages until I was relieved of all my tension and my cheeks felt like they were about to fall off. Mesa stopped to and smiled at me, renewed glow eminating from her.

"Can I practice with you now?" she asked, an excited gleem in her eye.

I gave a smirk and helped her up.

"Yeah. You can."

She smiled agian, picked up her blade, then she and I made our way outside to launch her blade for the first time. I grin and pad Plushie Dranzer, warm in my pocket,

'Merry Christmas.'

**A/NHow was that? More romance! YAY! Poor Kai is having so much trouble. Oh well, lot more fun for us! Please review!**


	10. Damn it all

**A/NSup peeps! Ok...got a short chapter for ya. It's kinda pointless, but it's needed. Trust me.**

**Chapter 10 "Damn it all"**

"That's it! Keep it up!" I order.

Mesa's blade dodged between the coke cans with impresive speed and struck her target, a basic wooden board, with all her strength. The board let out a cracking sound as her blade bounced off and spun to a stop three feet away. Mesa sighed with exhaustion and bend over, hands on her knees, as I walked up to the target and inspected the damage.

"Good job." I congradulated her, fingering where the board hung by a few rebelious trendles. "Almost broke it all the way through."

Mesa smiled tiredly at my praise and collapsed on the ground. I had been training her all morning, every morning, for the past week or so. And even in the bitter cold, she always managed to work up a sweat. I untie the board from its rope from which it had been hanging off a low tree branch and lay it in a nearby wood pile filled with other similarly split boards. Satisfied by her day's efforts, I sit down beside her and hand her a water bottle, which she guzzled up greatfully.

"You did real well." I mentioned as she drained half the bottle and rescrewed the cap.

"I try." she replies. "It's hard though. And honestly, I don't think I'm getting anywhere fast."

Not getting anywhere? She was kidding right?

"Your doing fine." I assured her. 'More than fine, actually.'

It's amazing at just how far she had come in only a couple days time. She was a quick learner, practically a natural, and it showed on the first day. Sure, her first launch was to be expected. Completely miss the dish and stop on impact. Normal first try right? Well, it was her second try that first alerted me to her skill. Not only did she get it into the dish, but she got it in nearly dead center, and her blade spun for well over ten seconds. It may not sound like it, but that is quite a feat. Not even I was that skilled when I started out. Mesa looked at me hopefully and I gave her a reassuring smirk.

"Kai! Mesa! Breakfast!" yells from the back door. "It's your favorite!"

I mentally grinned and stood up, helping Mesa get up herself and started torward the house. After retrieving her blade, Mesa goined me as I stepped through the back door, a wave of delicious smells greeting me. Toast. Hashbrowns. Bacon. EGGS. All were piled up on different plates on the table, a king's breakfast. Soon we were all sitting down to eat and I was aware of Mesa staring at me. Actually, not at me. My plate.

"What?" I ask, paranoid.

"You really gonna eat all that?"

I look down and stare at my meager helpings.

"Yeah...."I reply, confused.

She shakes her head and points beside me. "I ment your eggs."

'Oh...' Just a note, I love eggs. LOVE eggs. If the huge serving of eggs off to my right wasn't testament enough, then you have problems. I got enough to feed three other people.

"Yep." I say, causing Mesa to look at me wierd.

"Whatever you say..."

I had to hold back a chuckle as she dropped the subject and concentrated intently on her own food. , however, laughed at my expence and it took a warning glance from me to silence her. After that was over, Mesa went upstaires to clean up her blade as and I took care of cleaning the table. A perfect time to bring up a topic I would rather ignore.

"It's comming up you know." she said from over the sink, rinsing a glass and placing it on a drying towel.

"What is?"

"Don't act stupid Master Kai. The New Year's Ball. It's tomorrow night, and I bet you haven't even started writing your speech yet, have you?"

I sigh and growl to myself. Of course I hadn't started writing that yet. That would take a type of attention that I didn't have.

"I'm not going." tell her as I finished drying a bowl and put it in its cabinet.

"You know you have to go Master Kai. Every represenitive has too." she pressured.

"I don't care. It's stupid, pointless, and a waste of my time." I retort.

"So you HAVEN'T started it yet! Whether you like to or not, you know that you can't put things off 'till the last minute! And we all have to do things we don't want too."

"I know, I know. You don't need to lecture me..."

To clarify everything up for everyone, the city of Moscow has an annual New Year's Ball that takes place on New Year's Eve every year. The Ball is a time for prime ministers, political tyrants, important persons and whoever else is involved in our city's government to converge in a relatively crowded space, exchange ideas, dance, get drunk, and basically ruin the night for everyone else in a five mile radius of them. Ok, it's not really THAT bad, but it's still bad. And for someone like me, who perfers to keep to himself and has trouble acting like himself infront of his own friends (Mesa doesn't count), it's basically hell. And no matter how much I complain, I have to go. I AM the head of my family now thanks to sweet-ol granpa being in jail. Which means that all his political influence, wealth, and reputations are now suddenlly dumped on me. Thanks gramps....

"If it makes you feel any better," continues. "I will be there to watch you. And I'm pretty sure Mesa would like to watch you too....Which means...WE HAVE TO GO SHOPPING!!!!"

' sudden outburst nearly made me deaf and she hastially put down the dish she was washing and dried off her hands.

"You can finish this can't you Master Kai? Oh, I can't believe I forgot about our dresses! I will need a new one for this year! And Mesa needs one too!" she rambled as Mesa, as if on que, walked into the kitchen.

"Oh Mesa. Put your shoes on, now!" ordered as she grabbed two random coats, one of them being mine.

"Whats going on?" Mesa questioned as she quickly slipped on tennis shoes.

"We have to look for dresses for the Ball tomorrow!"

Before she could even reply, had dragged poor Mesa by the arm to the door and basically slung her out.

"Goodbye Master Kai!" she yelled before she slammed the door and was gone.

I stood there for a moment. Blinked. And brilliantly thought to myself. 'Thank gods that's not me.'

'No kidding.' Dranzer chirped in my head.

'Hey, long time no annoy.'

'I just thought I'd give you a little quality time to yourself. Your head is so chock-full of thougths and stuff, there's barely any room for me anymore!'

'What are you talking about?' I ask.

'What I'm talking about is that you think of nothing but Mesa these days. Mesa this...Mesa that. You just forgot about me didn't you?'

Anger flared up in me. 'I did not forget about you. And I'm NOT thinking about Mesa...'

'Oh yes you are!!' he sings in my head. 'You were just thinking about how good Mesa's going to look at the ball.'

'Shut up!' I yell back, embarassed.

'I was right? Dang! I was only kidding around too!' he gloated, and my moral hit rock bottom. 'Your in love with her!'

'I am NOT!'

'Kai's in love with Mesa! Kai's in love with Mesa!'

'Damn it!' I tried to block him out, but his stupid song still rung through my mind. And the more he sung it, the more embarassed I got. And the more embarassed I was, the more I thought. The more I thought, the more I believed he was right.

"Damn it all." I whispered as I asended the staires and entered my dark room which was slightly lit by what little sunlight squeezed through my blinds. I flopped down on my bed and buried my head with a pillow.

"I can't be in love with her. I just can't"

I repeated that to myself over and over agian, not believing a word of it.

'Do I really care about her that much?'

The simple fact was, I did. More than anything. I would jump infront of a bullet for her. Surely I would go to a stupid New Year's ball for her too? I sat up slowly, looked around my room once, and made a decision. Just as slowly as I sat up, I slid off the bed and picked up a random piece of paper and pen from my desk, sat down, and began to write.

**A/NAlrighty! Short chapter. But just wait. The next one will be well worth the wait! Hang tight and look forward to Chapter 11!!! See yall later!!!**


	11. It's real

**A/N!!!!!READ THIS PLEASE!!!!! Hello peoples!! Long time no write, I know. Simple fact is, I had a horrible combination of lazyness and, you guessed it, writers block. Anywho, I FINALLY got my lazy ass off the couch and sat it right here to bring you long awaited Chapter Eleven!! Which makes me remember, go up to the little drop box of chapters in the top right corner of this screen. Do it. Now, open it up and look at the chapter title before this one. If you recognize it, go ahead reading this chapter and skip the rest of this. If you DONT recognize it, then go back and read it. The reason I'm telling you guys to do this is because when I deleted my little notice and put up Chapter 10, NO ONE REVIEWED!!! Not even my normal reviewers. So either you guys didn't know I uploaded, or you just dont care. I hope it's the first one. Anywho, do that if you need too and I'll shut up and bring you this new chapter, which is certian to make up for my lack of updates (I hope). Without further adeu, Chapter 11!!!**

**Chapter 11 "It's real"**

'Get a hold of yourself Kai.'

Yeah right. Its the big day, December 31, New Years Eve. I'm standing by my self in a corner of my spaceous livingroom practically panicing and sweating bullets. I was currently waiting for my rent-a-limo, which had been graciously offered to me by a couple higher ups whom I didn't even know, and dug in my suit pocket for Dranzer. The cool blade brushes my fingertips, and it helps calm me, if only a little. There is a honk outside, and just like thay, my nerves come back agian. At the sound, comes down the stairs, grinning. Even 5 hours before the Ball was supossed to start, she was already primping herself up, her nails a bright happy yellow and basic make up on her face.

"Well you look dashing Master Kai." she mentions, staring at me.

I do my best to hide my embarassment, knowing that I probably did look over the top in my father's most expensive strait cut suit and red tie. I even had my hair up all nice and neat, like I used to always have it when I was on the Bladebreakers and BEGA. I broke my fingers free from fiddling with my cuff links and open the door to head outside and meet my ride. calls after me through the door.

"We will be there in a few hours to watch you give your speech! We'll be ready by then!" she yells and waves before I lose sight of her as she closes the door. I sigh, collect my wits and silently walk to the limo, a gentleman holding the back most door open for me. I nod my thanks and ease inside, at least a little thankful that I would ride to the other side of town with no other company.

***

If you have never seen The Pokrovski Cathedral, your missing out. It is widely considered the most beautiful Cathedral in all of Moscow, and I could see why. I had been here before, multipul times for different occasions, but as the light of the sky started to fade and cast a warm backdrop to the building's towers topped with Russia's symbolic and colorful 'onion' roofs, I was lost in it's greatness all over agian. Limos were lined neatly by the edge of the street infront of it, and bus loads of people of all kinds were crowding outside, taking pictures, talking, and whatever else. News crews greedily hogged the front doors that led into the Cathedral, and were determined to interview every significant person who just wanted to go inside. The driver, the same gentleman as before agian opened my door and I cautiously stepped out. I knew that the moment my foot touched the first step to head inside, I would be surrounded. Oh joy. The gentleman closed the door and followed me as I made my way slowly forward, picking up police guards along the way for protection. Not even half way there and I was already being assaulted by people, and it took all my strength to keep from smacking one of them to leave me alone. To cut it short, I wormed my way through the throng of people, thanks alot to my own personal human wall, and skirted inside, away from the flashing lights of cameras and the pesky voices of pancake-faced reporters. My guards left me and I let go of a breath I didn't know I was even holding. Of course, I sucked it right back once I gazed around me, at all the portraits and things usually found in the interior of a church. The beauty of the inside matched the outside. I was standing on the top side of a large floor, the pews having been moved away for the moment. On the side opposide me was an altar with numerous golden statues and candle stands and such. Representatives were scattered everywhere in small groups and I could see the wooden podium on my right where we would all give our speeches, and the large doors that lead outside on my left. Both places were crowded, so I snaked my way along the wall, trying not to draw attention, and asended a staircase set of next to the wall up to the second floor. It was much more open up there, only a few loners and a couple or two crowding around the large arch windows on either side of me. I chose an absent corner window for myself and leaned back to wait until the REAL important people begin to arrive, and this stupid carnival would finally begin.

***

"...and agian, I thank you all for comming."

The fat man on the podium bowed his head to us and left the floor. It was around eight o'clock now, and me having been here for the past 7 hours left me ready to yell at the first person who even looked at me. You would be like this too if you had to spend the previous two hours shaking hands and greeting strange smelling old guys and enduring cheek kisses from every old lady with them. Politic, politic, minister, politic...If I could survive tonight, it would be a blessing from God. The speech making was well underway, and I mentaly cringed, realizing that my turn was next. The applause died slowly, and an announcer guy (whatever he's called) steps up to introduce the next speaker, me. I close my eyes and utter a silent prayer before heading to the podium.

"And now ladies and gentlemen, the Representative for the Hiwatari Corporation and house, Kai Hiwatari!"

Neutral applause rings agian and I, agianst all my efforts, begin to shake as I take my stand and face the crowd. You would think I would be used to being gazed at by so many people, being photographed, critisized, but this was different than any Beyblade conference or meeting I'll ever go to. There, all I had to do was stand and do my best to ignore pestering fans and cameras, but here, I was expected to live up to my family's name, my Grandfather's reputation, and the whole of Russia's expectations. There was no room for mistakes when addressing nearly every member of your countries government and leading businessmen. No pressure. I cast my eyes over the crowd, who was quieting down, and stop on a grey haired, finely dressed older woman in a yellow floral dress who was smiling and giving me a thumbs up. Suddenly, my nervousness seemed to die away. Knowing that she and Mesa where here, though I couldn't see Mesa anywhere, gave me just enough confidence to help me make it through. 'I'll look for her later' I note to myself, letting my nerves calm down as much as they would allow. Reenergized, I face forward agian and clear my throat.

***

I had delivered my speech, which wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, and was making my way to the back of the makeshift ball room when I was assaulted by .

"You did wonderful Master Kai! Marvolus even!" she says, giving me a hug.

I give an embarassed laugh and return the gesture, feeling more at ease. We part and I look around me anxiously, only to be met with disappointment.

"Where is she?" I ask. 'She is here, right?'

"Oh...she should be here somewhere." replies. "She was with me until I lost her in the crowd."

She gazed around her just as I had done and her gaze stopped momentarially on a point behind me. grins.

"She'll find you." she says before turning and taking off before I can ask her what the heck she ment by that.

I sigh and turn around to head torward where she had looked, which was the stairs, just because I really didn't know where else to start looking. I dodge around a group of older ladies taking, lift my gaze, and stop DEAD. My breath knocked itself out of me for the third time that night as I watched her come down the staircase and stop at the bottom. Her eyes found me and blush flooded her cheeks as she holds her arms behind her sheepishly, easily more embarassed than I had been the whole night, and easily the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Mesa smiles shyly and looks up from underneath her lashes, which looked longer and darker than before. I took everything about her in, creating a mental picuture that I hoped would stay with me forever. She was wearing a simple light pink dress with a small bow on the side that just accented her perfectly, a pair of off white small-heeled sandals, a small jeweled necklace, and a decorative off white hair ornament. Her skin looked softer than the fabric of her dress, her hair was parted on the side, and was glossy, causing it to shine slightly in the light. Her light brown bangs fell elegantly across her forehead and she had just the smallest hint of pink lipstick and blush, though I couldn't tell if the later was makeup or not. I walked torward her carefully, and when I was close enough to hold her hand, I granted myself permission to gaze at her best feature. Her eyes snagged me from where they were caged between dark lashes. They seemed to hold entire galaxys in them, for how strong those evening cloud, moonshine, grey-blue eyes held me. She smiled agian, a perfect lovely smile, and I smiled back.

"You did great." she says, though I barely caught any of it, how tangled and distracted I was by her gaze. "I watched from the balcony. You didn't look nervous at all."

I numbly nod and manage to find my voice agian.

"Thanks." I said lamely, for once completely at a loss of what to say.

I was aware of music starting up in the background, a soft melody of violins, and how the crowd broke up in to two's and headed silently torward the center of the floor. I smiled and offered my hand.

"Dance with me?"

Mesa smiles shyly and, after a moments hesitation, nods, putting her right hand in my left. It was then that I saw what she wore on her wrist, and my heart swelled. She was wearing the gem bracelet I had given her when I had asked her to stay. Each individual gem shone in the dimming light, and I was touched beyond all explanation that she even thought of wearing my gift. Lost in alien emotions, we walked slowly torward the center of the dance floor, surrounded by bodys twirling and dipping and weaving in tune with the music. I held her hand even tighter and raised it as she softly layed her free hand on my shoulder and mine on her waist. My heart sped up, and then we were moving. Back and forth, around and around. The dances that I reluctantly learned in my childhood all came rushing back, and I projected it as if I had been doing this for years. We side-stepped and paced and spun. All of the moves I knew I executed, and I kept my eyes on her's the entire way. The song soon changed to something more upbeat and lively, and Mesa smiled and laughed as I stepped it up and twirled her even more. I could hardly believe that she was actually enjoying this. Enjoyed it with ME. The thought was completely alien to me, and felt strange as it traveled through my head. It was as alien as the pictures I mentaly took each time she twirled, her dress billowing out and her hair flying softly in the wind. And that was as alien as the emotions that played in my heart, which before had been as stone. The hardness had long been melted away, and now my heart felt limp, free. It felt wonderful, and I was elated. We danced and danced until the moon was high. The floor had dwindled down to a meager number by then, and I felt the need to get away from the watching crowds. I stopped Mesa and motioned torward the pair of large doors that lead out into the night. She nodded understanding and she took my hand as I led her away. The dark air was chilly, and the moonlight so strong, it illuminated the entire garden that was planted behind the church. Lights were even put up out here, though as far as I could tell, we were the only one's who were out here to notice them. We walked down a straight pebble path that broke to circle around a large fountian turned silver by the moon. We walked silently on until the church was hidden behind the trunks of trees that were sprouted randomly in the garden. It was here that we stopped to appreciate the scenery and quiet. We were still holding hands.

"It's almost a new year." Mesa mentoned softly. "It's quite daunting."

"Daunting?" I spoke quietly back, feeling the need to preserve the silence.

Mesa nods and looks up at the few stars that shone through the tree's branches.

"Two months ago, I would be elated to survive until the next day." she explained, and my bright heart now turned heavy. "But...a year...?" She shook her head and continued. "I was sure that I would never live to see tonight. It was just a nagging feeling. One that told me that my luck was running out."

She then turned and looked at me, and she suddenly smiled.

"But you proved me wrong. Here I am, on New Year's Eve. I have a home, a family...more than I have ever imagened myself having."

She let out a joyful laugh, eyes twinkling just like the stars above us, and her smile grew.

"It feels so unreal, like I need to pinch myself to wake up from a dream."

I shook my head in answer. "But it's not a dream. It's real."

"I know..." she says, casting her eyes down.

Suddenly, she stepped forward and slung her arms around me, and when she spoke, her voice was muffled agianst my chest.

"I know...." she repeated quietly, clinging.

Some strong emotion took hold of me then, and I wrapped my arms around her chilled shoulders. I could feel her shake as she cried silently into me, making the emotion even stronger. I pulled her closer and rested my head on hers. Even though she was crying, the moment was peaceful, and I stood there holding her with an ease I never knew I possessed. It was magical even, to stand like that. I raised one of my arms and lifted her head so she could look at me. I gave her a kind smile and stroked a stray tear from her cheek, trying to comfort her anyway I could. The emotion reached a pinnical, and I let it take hold of me completely. I knew what was comming, and by the way she looked at me, Mesa did too. We got closer, and she suprised me. She didn't turn away, and neither did she look nervous. She instead closed her eyes, and I kissed her. I was unprepared for the power that erupted when her lips touched mine. Unprepared for the sudden feeling of weightlessness, elation, bliss. It felt like I was flying and falling at the same time, and electricity shot and burned me where ever our skin touched. It was then, and only then, in that rollercoaster of emotion, that I finally realized just how much this one person ment to me. How much more this person, this girl, was worth more than all the money and power in the world. It was only then that I felt how different I was. So much of me had changed. I didn't recognize myself anymore. The old Kai was surely dead now, and he left a new one behind. One that was having the time of his life, doing the things he once thought were undesireable, feeling things that had been lost to him, with a girl who had, quite suddenly, become his whole world.

**A/NAlright peoples. How was THAT for a chapter! I hope it was worth the wait. Now we can only wait and see what is in store for them in the future. Oh, and here are a couple links if you are curious about what the Cathedral and Mesa's dress look like. Just incase you wanted to know. If they dont show up for some reason, you can look up my emo-named Photobucket account(darkness_heart) and they will be there. Until next time! Chao! ^_^**

**The Pokrovski Cathedral**

./2009/2513595303_?v=0

**Mesa's dress**

.


	12. A bit beast

**A/NThere is no way I can apologize enough for making you guys wait this long for an update. Simple fact is, I had lost my initiative to write due to severe, severe, horrible, terrible, freaking SEVERE writers block. To say the least, I was only able to write out the fist paragragh, then got stuck on how to continue it. Sure, I knew what was going to happen, it's just TYPING IT OUT thats a major pain in my butt. Agian, I can never apologize enough for making you guys wait, and I apologize for bringing you a crappy writers block ridden chapter. I hope you can forgive me. I still love you guys! ^_^**

**Chapter 12 "A bit beast...."**

Now I know what you all are thinking...'What happened after you kissed her?', 'What did she say?', 'Was is akward?'...you get the drill. Well, as for those, not much happened really. Sure there was a VERY uncomfortable silence after we broke (which, lets face it, was to be expected), and we stood saying not a word for a few seconds that felt like hours as we both assessed the other for their reaction. Mesa then motioned back torward the church stating that it was 'just a little chilly' (more like freezing 'cause it was a good 10 below), I wrapped her up in my jacket and that was that, all nervousness and embarassment aside. The quarter hour ride back home was uneventfull, I had led her upstairs to her room, said goodnight, then turned and entered my own. What DID happen though was that I didn't get a single wink of sleep the entire night and now, the day after, being sleep deprived is just starting to get to me. It's around two in the afternoon, 3.7 degrees F, and Mesa and I are outside by the beystadium just about to start our morning training (well is WAS going to be morning training if Mesa hadn't gotten up at a 12:06. I dont blame her for it though. I guess I would have slept in too if I actually had had the chance to sleep at all).

"Is this right?"

I blink and slightly shake myself out of my pondering and focus on Mesa, who's voice had called out to me from the other side of the beystadium. I sigh and walk around to help her with her problem.

"Raise your arms a little more, just above your shoulders." I say to her, taking a position behind her and moved her arms to how they were supposed to be. "With the way you launch, this will give you more power." I continue.

Mesa nods and concentrates. She had progressed far into her training, faster than I though. Right now, I was currently showing her how slight differences in stance can affect your launching power, which, for her, is quite the challenge. You see, no matter how much she tried, she just couldn't launch a blade from a normal stance, like Tyson and myself had long since mastered. It took a few hours, but we had finally figured out a stance that worked for her. Instead of holding the launcher and attached blade out in front like most of the population did, she held hers out to the side. Its very confusing to explain, but basically, she stands with her left side facing the stadium, feet splayed appart, and she holds the launcher in her left hand, poining directly to the stadium, and she twists just her upper half to face the stadium head on. It's really wierd, but Mesa's comfortable with it, and I did have to admit, her strange stance lends quite a good amount of power, 'cause not only can she pull the rip cord with her right arm with a suprising amount of strength, but she could also untwist her upper body, snapping it to lend even more power. I was impressed, to say the least.

"Now, get ready." I tell her, taking up stand on my side of the stadium and raising up my own launcher, Dranzer attached. "Do exactly what I showed you."

Mesa nods agian, taking up her own personalized stance. Involuntarially, my heart begins to beat faster. This is going to be the first time, her and I have actually battled, for real, and I was anxious to test her skills against my own.

"Three....Two.....One....NOW!"

We both launch at the same time, both our blades heading dead center for the stadium. But something unexpected happened. Quite suddenly, my world turned utterly white, so white that I have to cover my eyes with my arm, and I drop to one knee, a hiss of pain escaping me. A reprocussion hits me square in the chest, nearly sending me to the ground, and my only thought was, 'Where is Mesa?' I could still hear well enough, so I listened. I heard one of our blades still spinning at least, the other, I had no clue where it was. Another sound came to my ears though, almost like something was ripping and sucking at the same time. 'A demented vacuume cleaner. Great' I growl to myself as, slowly, the sound eased along with the blinding light. After a moment, all was normal agian, birds were singing, and everything sounded peaceful and quiet. To quiet. I stand and open my eyes cautiously, fearing the bright light would burn them agian, and blink, clearing annoying black and white spots out of my vision. 'What the hell was that!? And where is she!?' The spots finally disappear and, after a quick gaze around my very vast back yard, spotted Mesa on the ground. 'Oh gods, no....' Fear snaked it's way into me as I rush over to her side of the stadium, kneel down and lift her head off the snowcovered ground. My heart eased a little, she looked like she was asleep, but I couldn't be to sure.

"Mesa...Mesa! Wake up..." I whispered to her, shaking her gently.

I nearly laughed out loud in relief as her lids fluttered and she gazed up at me from between them, her beautiful eyes misty. She groaned in protest and quickly snapped her eyes shut agian, muttering something dully before turning her face into my arm like I was one of her pillows.

"......tire.....ed....." was all she would mutter to me, and I had to laugh at that.

"Perfect time to fall asleep." I joked with her lightly, though inside I was raging with questions.

'Dranzer, what the HELL was that?' I asked with my mind, and Dranzer quickly replied. 'I dont know....It felt wierd is all I can tell you.' 'Well THAT helps...' 'Well SORRY..! I'm over here in the snow by te way, and it is quite cold. Can you get me out?' 'After I get Mesa inside.' 'But I'm FREEZING!!' Dranzer yells, nearly making my mental eardrums pop. 'Well so is she. And your a freaking PHOENIX! You control FIRE for crying out loud! You'll be fine.' I retort back. I hear Dranzer sigh and grumble something along the lines of, 'choosing your girl-friend over me' or something like that. I grumble back at him as I swiftly swing Mesa's tiny body into my arms. I'm going to get him back for that snide comment later. Mesa groans in sleepy protest agian and digs her head into me, her whole body limp as I trek back to the house. Mrs. Gladys waits for me by the door, a look of horrified concern on her wrinkled face.

"What happened!? Is she alright?" she demands, practically dragging me to the couch.

I shrug half heartedly as I layed Mesa down, Mrs. Gladys covering her with a blanket.

"Just got tired from training." I mutter, turning to head back out the door.

Mrs. Gladys lets me, though I can feel her eyes burning into me with a your-going-to-tell-me-what-happened-or-I'll-ground-you-for-life intensity. I sigh and wave a lazy hand telling her that I would inform her later and step back out into the snow. I could still hear Dranzer grumbling in the back of my head even as I pick him out of a melted hole in the snow. 'See, your fine. Your just a sissy.' Dranzer mentally sticks his tounge out at me. 'Says you....' I roll my eyes and focus my attention on finding Mesa's blue blade in the snow. 'I dont think it's there.' Dranzer states, a hint of something unknown to me in his voice. 'Well if YOUR so smart, then where is it?' 'In the stadium.' he answers simply. I roll my eyes agian, not believing him one bit, but I glance at the bowl anyway, and what do you know....the freaking bird was right. I feel Dranzer nearly bursting at the seams, giving me I-told-you-so looks. I mentally glare at him back and make my way over to the stadium to retrieve the blade when something stops me. I cock my head to the side slightly as I look at the blade. 'Something isn't right....' Mesa's blade was shining at me with it's polished to perfection gleam from the center of the bowl. What was wierd about it though, was that it was DEAD center, and it was standing completely UPRIGHT on its tiny peg WITHOUT spinning. I blinked again at the strange sight, but the feeling still lingered. Sure, that was wierd, but that wasn't what was bugging me. I tentively bend over and take the blade into my hand, looking over it with a keen eye. 'It still looks as normal as ever....' I think, and it was almost right after I though that did I notice what was wrong. On top of her blade, in it's center, the bit chip wasn't blank anymore. In it's place was a picture of a strange, large eyed ghost looking thing carrying a lanturn in its hand.

"A bit beast...." I whisper to myself, fingering the bit chip with my finger.

'How the hell did this happen?'

**A/NCrappy chapter, I know. Sorry agian for that. Review please? Maybe that will help me get into a writing mood agian. Thankies to all of you!**


	13. I don't know you!

**A/NI am the most lazyest person in the freaking world man. Had to force myself to write this craptasitc chapter. Why? Because, unfortunately, I still have not regained my will or insperation to write (and I've gone back and rewritten the previous chapters so they are easier to understand and funner to read). But, alas. I owe you guys more than that, so I'm going to try my very best to update as much as I can. And I will be starting two new OC stories very soon for Max Ride(Iggy) and Naruto(Rock Lee). I'm also doing a Ray Kon oneshot and I'm contemplating on begining a new Kai Hiwatari/OC fanfic. I still loves you all very much, so PLEASE review! Thankies muches and bunches! ^-^**

**Chapter 13 "I don't know you!"**

"So you do not have ANY relevant idea as to how or why Mesa passed out, is that what your telling me Master Kia?"

For the hundereth time, I nod my head, failing to keep the irritation out of my gaze and features. Mrs. Gladys taps her foot infront of me, a look of deep thought upon her aged face. Me and her had been contemplating for hours on Mesa's fainting and, to our woe, came up with nothing. Zip. Zero. Nadda. A reaccuring fact that was leading both of us to our breaking points.

"Then I don't know what to do besides let her sleep." my maid finally said, easing her way to a chair opposite me in the small study that we had secluded ourselves in.

Currently, Mesa is still on the couch downstairs, sleeping like a dag gone rock. Comepletely and utterly oblivious to the worry and fret that she was tormenting Mrs. Gladys and I with. But like that accounted for anything much. I lightly shake my head and let out a growling sigh which echoed slightly in the small, quiet space. The silence remained unbroken other than that, the weight of concentration, thought, and ponder resting heavy upon the atmosphere. And that is how it stayed for a consideratbly long time before, finally, Mrs. Gladys had had enough.

"I'm going to go cook." she said bluntly, then, without another word, comforting or otherwise, stood and exited, leaving me alone.

Honestly, I didn't know weither I wanted to follow her example or not. To pretend that everything would solve itself. Oh, how I wished it would. My life would be so much easier that way. I stare at the dull rug below me, not seeing it. 'I cant act like Mesa is okay, and forget that this ever happened. I cant just sit here and wait for an answer that will never come either. The world doesn't work that way.' Almost unwillingly, I stand and make toward the door, closing it softly behind me. All is undisturbed, as if no one lived in this house at all. I dont know why I just noticed this. The note was stupid and pointless, but in a way, almost ironic. This place is so kept up, nice and need, organized, while it's occupants are anything but: unsure, confused, out of place. Is this some sort of sign? I'm not that big on religion, but, what if, somehow......

"KAI!"

The loud, sudden call from my maid made me jump five feet in the air, my heart nearly bursting out of my chest. 'Damn that woman! She's gonna kill me!' I growl, glaring daggers at the stairwell at the other end of the hall.

"What!?" I yell back, slapping on my irritation for added effect.

"Get down here now! It's Mesa!" the voice yells back.

I halt dead. Was that...fear...in her voice? 'Oh gods....' Uncertianty fills me quickly agian as I sprint down the stairs, nearly falling in the process.

"Mesa! Calm down!" I hear Mrs. Gladys plead.

'What the hell is going on down there!?' I reach the bottom and look up just in time to see two body's hit the floor, Mesa's voice reverberating painfully off the walls.

"Let go of me! Let go! Let go!" it calls, accompanied by various sounds of struggle, and the sudden shattering of glass. "Let go!!"

I sprint to the couple where they had disappeared behind the couch to find them on the floor, Mesa clawing at the floor like a dying animal, struggling with all her might with Mrs. Gladys desperately hanging on to her with a death grip, the only thing keeping the younger girl from running out of the room. The coffee table layed on its side behind them, water and shards of glass laying on the floor from where a glass cup had broken, the source of the shattering noise from before.

"Kai! Hold her!" my maid orders me, her fingers slipping.

I promptly obey and catch Mesa just as the older woman's grip let up, allowing Mesa a single second of freedom before I wrap my arms around her and pull her in, secureing her to me.

"Mesa! What's wrong!?"

My question goes, mostly unanswered, the girl to busy fighting agianst my hold on her.

"Let me go!" she yells agian, pushing agianst my chest.

"Answer me!" I order, not letting up. "Mesa!"

"Go away! Leave me alone!"

'Gods, help me!' I fearfully pray.

"Mesa, look! It's me! It's just me!"

For one fatefull second, beautiful grey-blue orbs meet my gaze, and it rips me in half. There was nothing but blind fear in those eyes. Painful eyes. Those of a person who didn't know where she was, and was being put to death. They weren't her eyes. Not Mesa's. I didn't recognize them at all. The stranger in my arms blinked for a single moment, the returned to her fighting, slowly getting weaker.

"No it's not! Let me go!" she screams. "I dont know you!"

'I dont know you!' Something hard and heavy slammed into me then, and an excrusiating emotional pain overcame me. 'Is this for real? What is she talking about?' All my fight left me then, my eyes glazing blankly. 'This isn't her. It's not. It cant be her. Oh gods please....' My whole body felt like it was being crushed, impaled, melted, and ripped all at the same time, how strong my hurt was. My body, through all the pain, still clung, and cling it did, all the way until the girl, panting and sweating with exhaustion, fought no more. A wierd humming sound came to my ears, and I tried to listen, but I was deaf. I tried to see, but I was blind, and I tried to speak, but I was mute. Everything seemed to have shut down on me, except for the vital organs that kept me painfully conscious. The girl in my arms shifted, but there was no power behind it, only dispair, and once again, her eyes met mine, and miraciously, I could see, if only those steely orbs. I was agast. It was like looking at a complete stranger. A complete, utter, stranger.

**A/NOkay, maybe this chapter isn't as crappy as I said it was. Hooray for plot twists! But it was kinda short. ' Darn it..... And dont be alarmed, all will be explained in due time. There's actually a very good reason behind why this happened, and I pride myself for comming up with it. So just stay tuned in! You wont be disappointed I swear! 'Cause it's almost time to reunite with some old companions. ^-^ And another note, for some retarded reason, whenever I upload a chapter, Mrs. Gladys' name ALWAYS gets taken out, leaving unsightly and annoying holes in my sentences that make it sound like I'm grammatically challenged, which I am not. As much as I wish too, I dont know how to fix that, and rarely do I remember to go back and edit, so please excuse all of that. It annoys the hell outta me too. Again, please. PLEASE review! I love them very much! Until next time! Chao!**


	14. So she will recover?

**A/NIf you've hung out to wait for this chapter to come, then I bow down to your patience. I'm doing my best to regain my will to write, and I'm hoping that adding a couple new stories will help out. That's it for now I think. So OWTF!**

**Chapter 14 "So she will recover?"**

Dissociative Fugue- a rare psychiatric disorder characterized by reversible amnesia for personal identity, including the memories, personality, and other identifying characteristics of individuality. That is what the doctor had said. I was horrified.

Mrs. Gladys and I had, in a panic, swiftly dialed the nearest hospital after I was sure 'Mesa' wasn't going to break away. EMS came, lifted her into an ambulence, then sped away, leaving the two of us to follow closely behind. Against all t.v. medical drama's that I had seen over my life, when Mesa was taken in, no one looked horrified, frantic, or even surprised. There was an air, stiff, serious, and business-like, that made me feel relieved and uncomfortable at the same time. Neither my maid nor I were allowed to see her, but we did wait in a hall near the room she was in, somewhere deep in the bowels of the ICU building, left alone without another soul to wander the halls around us, to break the silence that seemed to crush my chest, or to disturb the thoughts that threatened to kill me. We waited...waited...waited. Waited until we couldn't wait anymore. It's funny, how time seems to speed up during the best moments of your life, then crawl during the worst. It's cruel really, though it could have been worse. It was only about an hour or two before the doctor, a surpisingly young looking woman, came to us, dressed in true doctor fashion and invited us to take a small walk with her. We accepted. The woman enlightened us, explaining that, at that moment, Mesa was peacefully under slight sedation and that she would make a full recovery.

"All the blood work and scans that we have preformed to assure that Mesa's sudden episode was not intended, such as drug use, physical trama, etc., came up negative and everything looks fine."

A sudden burst of greatfullness washed over my body, and by the way the doctor blinked and smiled at us, I guessed that that relief showed on our faces. Mrs. Gladys beside me had shinning eyes from where unspilled tears of fret were reflecting the sanitary white lights above us.

"So she will recover?" the older woman asked in quiet hopefullness, recieving a nod in return.

"Yes. Though there is one thing."

Once light worry sets in agian.

"One thing?" the older woman voices again, and my ears pirk into deathfull attentiveness.

"Yes. Follow me." was all the doctor would say before turning and leading us back down the hall into a random room.

Agianst my will, my heart began to pound. 'What if they found something horrible? And that Mesa really ISN'T alright?' was all I could think of. I could feel Dranzer anxiously waiting along with me, uncharacteristically silent as the grave.

"It's nothing serious from what we can tell, just.... A little odd."

The doctor's attempt at easing our attitude didn't make much of an affect. Upon entering the vacant room, she led us to a wall that had, what I thought, was an illuminating clipboard, like those used to look at x-rays. My suspicion meter went up a notch.

"When we took an x-ray of Mesa's upper abdominal region to look for any signs of heart or lung complications, we noticed something preculiar." the woman continued, pulling an x-ray sheet from a clipboard of her own that I had not known she had been carrying.

With that said, she slipped the graph up onto the board and turned it on, instantly revealing a negative-colored photo of Mesa's neck, shoulders, and upper chest. My heart beat harder as my eyes immediately began to scan for any slight variation on her skeleton, searching for any anomoly that was not supposed to be there. I found it just as the woman pointed at it with her finger. There, in the middle space where the back of her neck joined the rest of her body was a tiny, white oblong square, smaller across than my pinky finger.

"Here you can see it clearly."

Mrs. Gladys and I both stared at the 'it' with ravage intensity.

"What is it? A piece of jewelry?" my maid finally had the guts to ask, sounding as confused as I felt.

"No." the woman replied simply, gazing levely at us. "We believe it's a microchip."

That bit of information was not what I expected. AT ALL.

'A MICROCHIP!? What is she, a dog or something!?' Dranzer rants in the back of my mind, sounding exhasperated and irritated.

I could identify.

"How do you know?"

That question was the first thing I had said all day, and it dripped with extreme earnest.

My tone must have caught the woman off guard, for she blinked a couple times, looking slightly agast, then composed herself for the most part.

"Well...." she began. "....it's impossible for it to be a zipper or other metal clothing accessory. She was wearing only a gown. And we check the machine weekly for faults...." She pauses to outline the object with her finger. "Also, this looks greatly similar to a chip you find in dogs, particuarly showdogs, or purebreeds. It's a way that owners can locate them if they somehow get stolen or lost."

"So basically, your telling us that Mesa has a global positoning chip inserted into her neck." I state, half growling.

The doctor looks uncertianly at me, as if I would bite her, and clears her throat.

"Y...yes sir. There really isn't anything else it could be." she hesitantly stutters.

The gravity of the situation sets like concrete; the air suddenly felt ten times heavier. The doctor clears her throat again and gives a small, shaky smile, motioning to the door.

"Would you like to see her?"

Mrs. Gladys stayed stock still beside me, and, with no response comming from her, I nod in her place. We were ushered out quietly, led down the rest of the hall, then to the room where Mesa was sleeping soundly inside.

"A few minutes is all I can give you. And another doctor will be joining you shortly."

Again I nod in Mrs. Gladys' place and the woman turns and leaves, looking very glad to finally get away. Without waiting for her to even go out of sight, I grab the cold knob and enter the room, completely unprepared for what I might find, or not find, inside.

**A/NI did a lot of research for this chapter, and I'm quite happy with it so far. But dont think that it will stop there. We still have yet to meet up with some old friends, and the plot will thicken more than you can imagine. Also, if you are a Ray Kon fan, then you may like to read my RAYxOC friendship one-shot. That turned out better than I thought, and it needs reviews. So does this. Please, PLEASE. I beg you. REVIEW. I THRIVE off your comments, and lately, I've been getting NONE. If ya'll review, I'll upload faster. Promise. I enjoy reading them, and I hope you enjoy my story enough to write them. Please and thankies! ^^**


	15. Do you know who I am?

**A/N Most of you poor people probably think I'm dead or something with how often, or not often in this case, I upload. Sadly, there is nothing that I can do to make up for my lack of consideration to you. Senior year in high school SUCKS. Work SUCKS, not as badly as school though. Writers block SUCKS more that both of those combined. There. You have my lame inexcusable reasons for my laziness. In other news, I WILL be writing another KaiXOC story for you guys to read, so be on the look out for that in the very near future. I'm almost done with the first chapter. Yay me! Hope you enjoy! :)**

**Chapter 15 "Do you know who I am?"**

Inside the small room contorted and covered with things in varying shades of wonderfully bright beige (note heavy sarcasm there) and a scent to send any self respecting person into a nervous breakdown, there was a window, curtains closed, a small end table with an electric clock that was around 16 minutes slow, a single dull yellow lamp emitting an even duller yellow light, a lonely patchwork chair in the corner, and an adjustable bed, upon which, under an off-white blanket or two, laid a light brown haired lump curled into a ball on her side like a cat, her back to us and face slightly hidden under the covers. A heart monitor stood beside her, a grim sounding but evenly spaced beeping coming from it, the only noise to disturb the silence. Mrs. Gladys steps in beside me, just as quiet, and stood. I don't really know what I was waiting for. I guess I was expecting Mesa to suddenly jump up out of her bed, face bright and happy and run to us and act like nothing out of the ordinary had happened. Yeah right. Like I would ever forget THAT.

_"I don't know you!"_

Pain pierces my chest as I cringe inwardly at the memory, that moment of pure confusion. She didn't remember me then. Didn't recognize me, didn't know me. What's to say that she'll know who I am now? As much as I hated to admit it, it's a very real possibility, a very terrifying possibility.

'Well, there's no way to find out unless you go to her.' Dranzer suggests softly in the back of my mind, sounding as apprehensive as I feel.

'I don't think I can.'

'Sure you can. What's the worst that will happen? Maybe she DOESN'T remember you, so what? You can just start over again.'

'That's easy for you to say…'

'Yes. Yes it is.' He croons stylishly, oozing pride.

'Smart-ass….'

'Thank you!'

'Don't push your luck bird.' I caution him, growing irritable.

My warning failed miserably, being greeted only with more giggles. I sigh and do my best to ignore him and, against my best judgment, I knew he was right. I had to take the chance, for all or nothing. My maid seemed to have a similar idea in mind too, but pushed me ahead of her, urging me to be the first. I stopped only for a moment to whisper a silent prayer and give her an exasperated look before inching my way to the bed, Mesa still in oblivious slumber. If it was possible, she's even more captivating in sleep that she is awake; her features relaxed and open, unaware, her lips parted slightly, making her look young and childlike with the covers pulled up around her in a sort of makeshift cocoon. The scene is almost comical, except for the gnawing fact of exactly where we were. I stand, looking at her, afraid to touch her. I expected for Dranzer to make another smart-ass comment on my hesitating, but he didn't utter a word.

'Now or never.' A voice echoes, recognizing that it was only my own thoughts in my head now.

Ever so lightly, I place a soft hand onto a lump that I assumed was her shoulder and nudged her a bit.

"Mesa…." I whisper, barely hearing myself.

When she doesn't move, I clear my throat and call out to her again.

"Mesa. Wake up."

I nudge her again, a little more forcefully. They must have had her completely drugged up with something, 'cause Mesa wasn't responding at all. I sigh and attempt to wake her one last time.

"Mesa."

I practically ordered her and, surprise, surprise, the mound shifted, a tiny groan escaping its lips. I smile and repeat myself to Mesa's apparent dismay, shifting to cover her entire head with the blankets she clung to, muttering something illegible.

"Come on Mesa. This is no time to be sleeping." I chuckle as finally, she opens her eyes and turns a sedated look toward me, looking very much like a kid being woken extra early for school.

"Huh…?" she groans, blinking sleep away.

"Get up." I order gently one last time, putting my hands away while she rises as slow as the sun and the moon, easily more glorious than both.

She blinks heavily again and gives a luxurious yawn, stretching for a moment, then contents herself with rubbing the sleep out of one closed eye, the other half opened and still looking at me. I could feel my heart pounding dully in my chest as her still blank eyes refused to register.

"W….wher 'm I?" she mutters before yawning again, turning her head to follow Mrs. Gladys as she joins me.

"Your at the hospital sweetheart." She says, sounding relieved and distressed at the same time.

I guessed she feared that Mesa wouldn't recognize her either. Nevertheless, my maid smiles.

"You passed out. Do you remember?"

Mesa lazily shook her head, resting her hands in her lap.

"Well, you gave us quite a scare. We were very worried about you."

Mesa's eyes clouded.

"You were?" she asks, sounding confused.

"Of course. That's why we came in to see you. We wanted to make sure that you were alright."

Mesa's expression didn't change, and Mrs. Gladys' heart and my own seemed to clench a little. Just as I feared; she didn't appear to remember us at all. The doctors had lied. They had said that she would make a full recovery, but they were wrong. How could she be recovered if she forgot the ones who took her in? It's…wrong, cruel, evil, insensitive…. Unfair. Mesa didn't do anything to deserve this… this disability. She's so kind, and wholehearted, and loving, and innocent. Anger flares up in me like a vengeful flower, along with bitter disappointment that tasted like bile.

'Is this some type of joke? What do you want me to do? Plead? Beg? 'Cause I will, unless this is a punishment for me.'

Either God didn't hear me, or he just didn't care to answer. I have never been big on religion, but now I found myself pleading and cursing every deity I knew, sorrow raking my ribs and ache stabbing my throat as the girl before me satisfied herself with assessing the room around her, paying no attention to the people inside it. Mrs. Gladys beside me had the look of a beaten animal, eyes wide and hollow, tears twinkling in the nasty yellow light. My own eyes were burning as well, and I swiftly brushed the forming tears away with my arm as a door opens and a middle aged man in a white doctor's coat steps in, clicking the door quietly behind him. Mesa turns her attention to him, her fingers playing with the edge of her blanket.

"I'm glad to see that she's awake." He says through an easy smile, offering his hand. "I'm Dr. Grierson."

Mrs. Gladys and I silently shake his hand as he folds his arms, looking very calm.

"Has Ms. Nicole showed you Mesa's x-rays yet?"

"Yes." Mrs. Gladys answers stonily.

"Then you are aware of what we found." He states, not really asking.

"Yes." Mrs. Gladys answers again.

Dr. Grierson fakes sympathy.

"Well. I have a few things to ask you concerning that…." He begins, retrieving a pen from his coat pocket and a clipboard with some weird chart on it that had been hanging on a hook at the foot of the bed.

"We didn't put that chip in there if that is what your wondering." Mrs. Gladys interrupts him, sounding uncharacteristically acidic.

"Of course not. I never thought it was." The doctor reassures her a little to quickly, looking over the various papers on the clipboard. "I was merely going to ask you if she was your biological granddaughter."

The doctor turns a questioning eye to her. There was something there, something about him altogether, that gave me the creeps. My maid apparently had the same assumption.

"Partially." She alludes, avoiding the question while firing one of her own. "Why do you need to know? That is personal information."

"It's all for the sake of her records; incase the police need to see them in the future."

I narrow my eyes at his answer.

"Why would they need them?"

Dr. Grierson looks exasperatedly at the wall behind us.

"Incase she is ever lost or kidnapped or murdered. They need to know where she's been and when."

Mrs. Gladys doesn't look to be buying that at all, and I secretly rooted for her.

"Well I for one do not understand the necessity of asking for this information." She informs the now slightly surprised doctor. "And if there is ever a time to where the police need that information, I will give it to them myself."

There was a hint of finality in her voice that must have rung a warning bell in Dr. Grierson, for he said nothing, clutched the clipboard to himself, turned, and exited the room without a word. Tension vibrated audibly in the air and I felt myself relax hands I hadn't know I had clenched, a wavering breath escaping me.

"I don't like him." I say simply, Mrs. Gladys nodding in agreement.

"Neither do I. I never cared much for doctors anyway." She said smartly then also let out a wavering breath of her own, walking over to the lone chair in the room and sinking into it heavily.

"I wished I could have asked him about that chip, though. See if there's a way of getting it out."

"Yeah." I sigh back, taking a seat on the edge of Mesa's bed, looking down at my hands.

Things just got more complicated and annoying by the day. Whatever happened to the time where all I did was wake up, eat, practice, then go to bed? Ever since Mesa came in, my life has taken some pretty drastic turns, one of which I could do very well without. The ache in my throat crawls in again.

'Mesa….'

My eyes begin to burn and the ache deepens as the gravity of the situation sets in. I've lost her. After only a few months, I've already lost her. I must be a horrible person; I have to be, to let this happen. It's like that time at the lake, after I first met the Bladebreakers and betrayed them, allying myself with that piece of shit Boris and Voltaire. At the time, when I had Black Dranzer in my hand, it had felt so _right_, like it had always meant to be that way. I thought I was doing the right thing, not necessarily for the team but for myself. I was so sure I was doing all right, up until the ice broke and I nearly drowned in that god forbidden lake. Right now, the lake is breaking again, but it's a different lake: deeper, colder, more unforgiving. Even if I hadn't of been saved by Tyson and the others, even if I had captured all their bit beasts, I would have still of had the chance to change it all if I had wanted to. But not this time. There's no way to change Mesa back now. It's permanent, and I can't just say I'm sorry and fix everything up. I failed. I failed her, I failed Mrs. Gladys, and I failed myself.

'Can I not do ANYTHING right!?' I shout inwardly, feeling contempt for myself as much as hearing.

'It's not your fault Kai, it was a freak accident; nothing to do with you….'

'Your wrong Dranzer. I pushed her to hard. She wasn't ready, and I didn't notice. I was so determined to make her great that I got caught up in it all. I ignored her and the fact that I….'

Something warm wrapped around my hand. Knocked out of my daydream, I lift my head to see two floating orbs the color of winter rain, glowing with concern. I blink, not wanting to believe.

"Mesa?" I whisper so softly that I didn't even hear myself.

Mesa blinks also, only quicker, and her head tilts slightly to the side.

"Are you okay?" she says.

'This can't be happening. My mind is playing tricks on me.' I think, swallowing down a rock that spontaneously appeared in my throat. Her eyes are clear now, not dreamy and clouded, and the concern in them deepened for a moment, then lightened slightly, reassurance mixing in.

"I'm okay." She assures me in her small, childlike voice. "You don't have to be sad anymore."

I couldn't believe it. Mesa was speaking as if she were comforting a younger sibling, someone she knew. Quite unexpectedly, hope sparked somewhere deep inside and, the longer I looked at her, the larger the flame grew. Maybe I had been wrong. Maybe Mesa _does_ remember me.

'Oh gods, please let it be true.' I prayed, feeling Mrs. Gladys' eyes on me and seeing Mesa's features turn faintly confused.

She opened her mouth, I assume to ask me if I was all right again, but I stopped her, grabbing her by the shoulders a little more forcefully than I intended, but held her gaze, determination fueling me.

"Do you know who I am?" I demand, unyielding.

"What?" she questions, her confusion increasing.

"Do. You. Know. Who. I. Am." I demand again, giving emphasis to each word, unwaveringly serious and seriously unwavering.

"Of course I do. Am I not supposed t…."

"What's my name?" I disrupt.

I had to make sure that I wasn't hallucinating, that I wasn't imagining the recognition I thought I saw in her eyes. Minor annoyance contorts her beautiful face as she replies.

"Kai…. Hiwatari…. That all?" she says, bestowing both parts of my name with weight as if she were explaining something to a three year old.

My hands loosen their grip on her shoulders in disbelief. She remembers. She remembers! Abruptly, it seems that my entire soul just caught fire considering how greatly warm I felt inside. I don't think I had ever felt this happy, this elated, this…relieved. In one swift motion, ignoring her squeak of surprise, I lean over and take her into my arms, never wanting to let her go.

'Oh Mesa….'

She was rigid with surprise and confusion at first, but then she relaxed, half hugging me with her hands because I had unintentionally secured her arms to her sides with my own arms.

"It's okay Kai." She repeated softly in my ear, sounding bewildered and flattered.

I couldn't answer because inside I was rejoicing, but I did respond by curling my arms tighter around her tiny frame, lifting a hand to stroke her light brown hair that felt like feathers. It didn't even occur to me that Mrs. Gladys was probably patiently awaiting her turn to hug the girl I selfishly held until I felt Mesa retract out of my grip slightly and, after a prompt, I regretfully let go, allowing a teary eyed maid of mine to hug her.

"You scared me to death. I thought that you wouldn't come back to us." She cried, pulling back to look at Mesa, a smile on her old, wrinkled face.

"Sorry." The younger replies sheepishly, blushing slightly. "I don't remember."

"That doesn't matter now. We'll explain when we get home." Mrs. Gladys encourages, patting Mesa lightly on the cheek before standing and heading to the door.

"Where are you going?" I question.

"To sign Mesa out." She replies, opening the door. "I would rather her recover at home."

I nod as she leaves, the door locking behind her, glad that we would finally get out of this hellhole.

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**A/N Okay. I knew that the last chapter was a little disappointing length wise, so I hope that this one kinda made up for it. This isn't even all of it. I had to cut it in half believe it or not (I was in a big writing mood today apparently 0_o). So there ya go. One nice, long chapter to help prepare you for another chapter that I hope will be just as long. Yay! :)**


	16. Polta

**A/N Not much to say at this point besides hope you enjoy this chapter. Now READ DAMMIT! XD**

**Chapter 16 "Polta"**

Only Mesa and I were in the room and, as I turned my attention from the door Mrs. Gladys had disappeared behind back to her, I was surprised to see her looking upset.

"What's wrong? Do you hurt anywhere?" I quiz her, fret spiking my words.

She merely shakes her head, looking down at the blankets covering her lap. She hesitated before she spoke.

"I… did something bad, didn't I?" she whispered softly, like she were telling a secret.

I blink at her, surprised, and not quite understanding what she meant.

"Bad?"

"Yeah." she continues to whisper, looking up at me through stringy light brown bangs. "That's why were here, isn't it?"

I honestly didn't know what to say. It was a true statement after all, but I couldn't just say 'Yep. You freaked out so we took you to the hospital 'cause we think you've gone crazy.' That's just a first class ticket to depression and destruction…. So WHAT could I tell her? Should I explain what happened, or does she remember. Could she remember? I hold her gaze steadily, contemplating and analyzing all the possibilities I could imagine silently. Our eyes stayed connected, and though I wasn't really looking at her, I could see that every dragging second, her features altered slightly more and more into a look of uncomfortable distress until the point came to where she just couldn't keep my gaze any longer. This bothered me. She truly does think that she did something wrong, doesn't she? But that's not entirely the case, if I could prove that she is sincerely ignorant of the event that brought us here.

"Mesa," I spoke, not breaking my eyes away from her.

A long moment passed before she twitched just enough to look back at me from under her bangs.

"What all do you remember doing today?"

Confusion crosses her face.

"W… what?"

"What all do you remember doing today?" I repeat evenly.

My gaze must have been boring into her because she was struggling to keep from fidgeting under it.

"Enough I guess."

"List it off. Tell me everything."

"Why?"

"Just do it."

My tone of authority did the trick. Mesa moved so that she was leaning against the risen part of her bed before beginning.

"I remember getting up this morning and eating…."

Her voice reeked of strain, and her face contorted with uncertainty again. I give her a slight nod, urging her to continue. She swallows nervously.

"After that, we went out to train. We had a battle, then I took a nap. After that…."

"Wait. Is that all you can remember?"

"Did I miss something?"

"No just…. The battle. Do you remember how that went?"

Mesa looks at me like I was the one who was crazy.

"Of course. We counted down, launched, then…. Um…."

She pauses for only a moment, brows scrunching in thought, then lets out a tiny breath, a sudden look of astonishment and realization, and perhaps a little fear, enveloping her face. I expected as much.

"You don't remember, do you?"

At my voice, she turns to me, her horror growing steadily. With great hesitance, she asks a simple question.

"Do you?"

"Remember? Yes." I reply, waiting for the question I knew was coming.

A total of eight seconds passed by before it came, in a voice as low and whispery as the coo of a dove.

"What happened?"

There was an air of much uncertainty around her. Her eyes locked on to her lap. I wait for a few moments, to make sure she wanted to know or that I was ready to tell her, I wasn't sure. In the end, I spilled it out in slow, even intervals; the loud sound of something being ripped, the white flash, finding her on the edge of consciousness… everything. She stayed silent throughout the entire retelling, neither moving nor looking toward me. I told her about finding her blade in the dish, completely vertical, at which she suddenly swiveled her head up to me with an emotion I couldn't quite decipher.

"Do you have Her?" she inquires quickly, catching me off guard in more ways than one.

"Who? Ms. Gladys?"

"No."

I was surprised by the fierceness in her voice as she replied to my uncomprehending answer.

"Her. I think you have Her. You have to have Her."

"Who? Give me a name." I ask again, quickly growing agitated.

Mesa didn't answer me with words. Instead, she looked as if she were at a loss for them, and with nothing else she could probably think of to convey what she wanted to say to me, began motioning wildly with her hands; whirling and making circles. With each motion, Mesa looked to grow more and more frustrated with not being able to make me understand. I had a hunch that she didn't know what she wanted to say herself.

'Maybe she's asking for a some_thing_, not a some_one_.'

In all the haste that had been going on, I had completely forgotten about a certain obnoxious phoenix in my head.

'How do you know?' I ask.

I can feel him shrug.

'I don't. It's just a hunch.'

In actuality, it wasn't such a bad idea. Returning my attention to the distressing girl in front of me, who was still stubbornly making incomprehensible motions, I snap my fingers to get her to stop.

"Mesa, are you wanting an item? An object or something?"

Mesa's face brightens considerably, and she nods.

'NOW we're getting somewhere.'

Giving herself a second to think, she snaps back into motion again, this time, making a fist with her left hand, like she was holding something, placing her other hand behind it, fingers slightly curled, then snaps it back in a quick action that shakes the bed. Mesa repeats the motion again and again, something utterly familiar with it.

'It looks like she's pulling something back.' Dranzer chirps.

'Yeah, or she's pulling something off something else. Or _through_.'

The more I watched, the more I began to understand, and suddenly, I wonder why I hadn't recognized it the first time.

'Her hand is holding something, and the other is launching it. She's talking about a beyblade launcher.'

With that sudden epiphany, I figured out what she was asking for. Without saying a word, I reach into my pants pocket as pull out a cold, metallic, blue top and hand it to a now excited Mesa, who eagerly takes it away from me and cradles it in her hands like a baby bird. I lean over to watch her as she slowly raises a slender finger and strokes the bit chip; actually, to be more precise, the picture ON the chip. In all the haste from before, I apparently also forgot about the new addition to Mesa's blade. With a look that almost resembled love, Mesa gazes at the image of the strange bit beast, smiling. And I might be crazy, but it looked like the image smiled back at her. She stroked the image again, her finger lingering on it, then unexpectedly spoke.

"Polta." She whispers out in the open.

"Um…. What?"

Mesa turns to me, gray-blue eyes shining.

"Polta."

I still didn't know what she was talking about.

"She's my friend."

"You mean, that's its name? The bit beast's?" I ask, my bewilderment steadily mounting.

"Her. That's HER name."

'Okay…." Dranzer caws bluntly. 'I'm confused.'

'That makes two of us.'

'Since when did she have a bit beast?'

'I don't know. I guess it….'

Another epiphany hit me.

'The white flash. That's when it happened.'

'When what happened?'

'When the bit beast entered Mesa's blade. I don't know how it did, or where it's from, but that's the only time it could have happened. It wasn't there before the battle, but when I found it after, it was there.'

'And Mesa doesn't remember ANY of that because….' Dranzer drags on.

'I don't know.'

I recalled the hideous ripping noise, but no idea's came up. Mesa continued to stare and stroke her blade, unconcerned about the world around her.

'I don't know, but I'm gonna find out.' I finally sum up, then slide off the bed, knocking Mesa out of her trance.

"Where are you going?"

"We're leaving. Mrs. Gladys will be back soon to get us."

I reach over to take the blade from her.

"Get dressed and we'll get going."

Mesa resists me and clutches the blade to her. I sigh and decide to drop it.

"I'll be right out here. Hurry up so we can go" I order before turning and exiting the room.

I had never felt my mind rush so much in my life. It's practically revolving a billion times a minute; recycling, reanalyzing, re-everything.

'I don't know if I can take much more of this Dranzer.'

'Neither can I. It's getting crowded in here.'

'Drop…. Dead….'

Dranzer giggles, then moves to the back of my mind as I turn to the sound of footsteps coming down the hall. Mrs. Gladys smiles at me.

"Can we leave?"

"Yes. The woman at the main desk kept trying to convince me to keep Mesa here. If there hadn't been two little kids in the room, I might have ripped her head off."

"Whoa…. Calm down now. This is a hospital." I say, raising my hands defensively.

Mrs. Gladys merely gives me a look the equivalent of rolling her eyes, and motions to the closed door that I was currently leaning my back on.

"Is she getting ready?"

"Yep."

I didn't dare tell her about the new bit of information I had just been told. She could do without it for now.

"Did you tell the receptionist about that doctor?"

"I did, but of course she didn't do anything about it. The nerve of some people."

We waited a minute or so in silence before Mesa came through the door dressed in jeans and a t-shirt.

"Alright." Mrs. Gladys smiles to her, then leads the way down the hall.

No one attempted to interrupt the quietness in our little group, me especially. I was having enough trouble trying to quail the hurricane inside my mind. I felt oddly irritated and angry for some reason. I was mad about everything; not knowing what was going on with Mesa, the reason why she was in her in the first place, not having had the power to stop that reason…. I was beginning to feel a little overwhelmed and, lets face it, helpless, and I HATED feeling helpless. What kind of a person am I? What kind of guy? What kind of MAN? Sure, I did not take pleasure in conversing and interacting with the female race ('cause most of them are rabid and make obscenely obnoxious marriage proposals to me), but I do have the decency to protect them if need be, like a _true_ gentleman should. What did that make me for letting this happen then? I didn't realize that I was raging until something touched my fisted hand. Softly, the fingers gently pried mine apart and slipped in, a silent form of friendly reassurance. I didn't look up at her, and I was pretty sure that she didn't look at me, but that was okay, her hand did the trick. My anger dwindled until it was a smooth pool once more, and my breathing returned to normal. The warmth and softness of her hand felt good against mine, and casually, I hoped that my calluses didn't bother her. They mustn't have, because she didn't let go until we got to the car. I didn't sit in the front like I normally would have. Instead, I sat in the back and, even though we weren't holding hands anymore, she laid hers right next to mine, so that they were barely touching. Looking out the window, I move my pinkie and lightly twine it with hers in the universal sign for friendship.

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**A/N Yay for fluff! Okay, I know I've said this about a hundred times, but an old friend will appear in the next chapter for sure. From there, things will get TRULY interesting. ^^ Please review! Oh! Wait! I forgot. I uploaded a crappy Paint picture of Polta on my emo named photobucket (darkness_heart) for those who wonder what she looks like. And also, she isn't an original. She is one of the bit beats you can find on one of the beginner beyblades, so I don't claim her, I just use her because she is my bit beast and it fit Mesa perfectly. So there you have it. Thankies again! :D**


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